"But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
I have been spending some time thinking about youth sports, among other interesting topics, including Kate Middleton’s whereabouts, the effects of plastic on the environment, and natural gas drilling’s health impacts. Topics for another day, I guess.
But, back to youth sports. I think we have officially entered the “youth sports era” of our lives. Our oldest daughter is now 14 and enjoyed her first season of middle school sports this past year, running cross country in the fall and playing basketball for the local Christian school in the winter. We are currently taking a break between sports seasons, so I’m enjoying a little bit more time at home before the boys’ baseball season begins. And then back to cross country in the fall!
Overall, I have enjoyed the experience of being a sports mom, but, I am also really cautious about how easy it could be to let it take over our lives. And I’m all for doing your best at a sport or school or whatever, but I do not want to get sucked into the sports vortex.
So here are some thoughts that I have that I hope will keep us somewhat balanced when it comes to youth sports:
Keep perspective: I think it could be really easy to put too much emphasis on the kids’ performances in sports and other activities. It’s pretty cool when your kid does well, and it’s tempting to have them do just a little more to get to the next level. Not necessarily a terrible thing, but here’s a dose of perspective: My kid— and yours– are not likely to be professional athletes. I mean– I’m almost 100% positive it’s not in the cards for my kids, and likely– it’s 99% that your kid won’t either. The point of youth sports is to teach kids to work hard, to be on a team, and to get in the habit of training their bodies and minds. That’s it.
Count the cost: There is more than one cost to playing youth sports. There is, of course, the monetary cost– equipment, sports fees, travel, etc. Youth sports are a big business! But there is also the cost in time and family resources that must also be counted. How many meals around your table are you willing to sacrifice for a sports season? Can the family handle the travel time and late nights? Is it worth it for your family in this season? Not every family can handle the monetary or time costs for every season, and that’s okay.
Let your kid play: As a former athlete, it’s tempting to try to either make my kids play the sport I loved, or to, perhaps, overload them with all of my wonderful wisdom. And you know what– I may have a lot of experience and wisdom to give my kid, but wouldn’t it be nice if she could discover some things for herself? I mean– at this point– it’s not my time to shine– it’s her time to see what she’s made of.
Let the coaches and officials do their jobs: Pretty self-explanatory. If youth sports are about letting your kid develop her skills of independence, teamwork, and hard work– then I really don’t need to get involved when the ref makes a bad call, do I? Because the stakes for winning the game really aren’t that high. I mean– unless my kid gets slammed to the ground in a illegal wrestling move– then– all bets are off.
And finally- don’t forget to have fun. If you’re having fun, you’ve won! (Well, not really… but in the end that’s what youth sports are supposed to be about, right?) It’s for FUN!
Our local little league has a sweet poem that I have seen displayed on the dugout:
It has been fascinating for me to watch how our media has changed its approach to obesity in the last few months. If you look back at articles from CNN, for example, up through 2022, people “were” obese. It’s how pretty much every article about obesity referred to the condition prior to 2023. Obesity was a “state of being.” In 2023/ 2024, every (CNN) article I have read describes people “with obesity.” It’s a subtle shift and it may be easy to miss, but it is absolutely purposeful. Obesity is no longer the way we are. Obesity is a disease we have. The question is: why?
It’s interesting to me that the language change surrounding obesity corresponds to the approval of a new drug that can combat obesity by suppressing appetite. Wegovy was approved in June, 2021, “for chronic weight management in adults with obesity” (emphasis, mine) by the FDA.
This shift in language has been bothering me for the past several months. But, when I looked at CNN today, there it was again. Dr. Sanjay Gupta, CNN’s “chief medical correspondent” has a whole podcast discussing “Is Ozempic really a miracle drug?” where he reviews the new “$100 billion” potential annual revenue maker. Overall, the doctor he interviews, Dr. Jorge Moreno, seems quite excited about this new drug, explaining multiple times that he has “taken away his patients’ guilt” in regards to their chronic obesity. He describes how they “cry in relief” when they hear that their “disease” is not their fault.
I get that. When you struggle with something- whether it’s obesity, addiction, or anxiety, it’s kind of nice to know that it’s not your fault. It’s actually your hormones or you genetics or the “obesigenic” environment you live in. And then to find that there’s a new medication that can actually fix it? I mean, that’s pretty exciting. And to some extent, this all may be true. Humans are complex beings and we do not always do what we want to do. We are not totally the masters of our own destiny.
And yet, when it’s all out of our control anyway, do we have any power at all? Does this line of thinking make us completely powerless in the face of doughnuts and cookies? Are we just victims, doomed to obesity without getting the “medicine” that we so clearly need?
I know that this is an area to tread lightly. I know that obesity is challenging. I know that losing any weight is challenging (speaking from personal experience here!) I’m not even personally against using drugs or surgery in some cases. But- I tell you this- someone is capitalizing on making obesity into the latest disease. And people are buying it, giving Wegovy a profit of $4.2 billion dollars in 2023, and Ozempic $11.1 billion dollars in profit. This is not good. (Except for the share-holders in these companies. For them it is very good.)
We cannot accept the message that we are mere victims of our passions and circumstances. We are human beings, with the potential at least, for qualities like self-control, patience, and endurance, especially when we exercise those qualities. We have more responsibility for our own health than we often want to acknowledge. Maybe these new drugs are going to help some people. But, I doubt the message is. Victims are powerless without someone helping them. And Big Pharma stands ready to lend a hand yet again- provided we fill their hands up with money.
It’s the most wonderful time of the year! No, we have not entered the holiday season quite yet; it’s cross country season! It is a great time of year to be a runner. The weather is getting crisp, the leaves are changing, and running is becoming a little bit less sweaty. It is also officially cross country season across most of the United States, so the kids are out running around their schools and on the roads.
When you see a runner on the road, he should be running against traffic. That means when you are driving, you will see runners facing you. Exceptions to this are on a blind hill or narrow curve when a runner should cross the road and will be running with traffic.
Cars are probably a runner’s greatest danger. To help keep them safe, here are some tips to help a runner out!
When you see a runner, please slow down. It’s much more comfortable for the runner if a car does not whizz right past.
If you have the room and there are no other cars coming, please give the runner some space! There is no rule that you must keep perfect lane position at all times. I am always extremely grateful when a car gives me a wide berth.
Please feel free to wave! It’s very encouraging when drivers wave to you when you are out running.
But– please don’t honk your horn! It is really very disconcerting when you are on a run and everything is quiet and calm and out of nowhere, a honk blasts your ears.
And last- if you are a dog-owner, now is a great time to make sure your dog is unable to chase a person running past. Out of all the obstacles a runner faces, cars and dogs are probably the biggest threats we encounter. I have two friends who have actually been bitten by dogs while running, one quite badly. Please- restrain your dogs! (I will give exception to a sweet golden retriever, but know– they may end up at the runner’s house at the end of the run!)
For all my runner friends- I hope you enjoy an awesome season doing what you love, and for all my non-runner friends- slow down, move over, wave, and shake your head at what your crazy runner friends are doing today.
When Stephen and I started to talk about getting married, we also discussed how many kids we wanted. Surprise! It was a lot! He comes from a family of nine, and I come from a family of three, and we decided we wanted to meet somewhere in the middle. When we started making our plans, I was really into running and fitness, and I couldn’t imagine giving that all up when we started our family.
So, I made a vow. I would run a half-marathon after every baby. It was a challenging enough goal to make me feel like I would be accomplishing something big, but short enough that it didn’t entail crazy amounts of training beforehand. In retrospect, it was kind of an audacious goal since when I made it, I didn’t really understand all the things that go into having babies and recovering and taking care of them. But, I think it was also a really good goal for me, and I am proud to say that after six babies, I am going to run my seventh half-marathon next week (I got an extra one in during COVID.)
I know that running and fitting in workouts is challenging for ladies with a family, especially with little ones, so I want to share some tips for getting fit after baby! I truly believe anyonecan do it!
Get a goal! The first thing you have to do to get fit after baby is to get a goal. You need a tangible, time-bound goal to meet. For me, it was completing a half-marathon, but it could be signing up for a 5K, completing a workout program, exercising three days a week for a month, etc. Keep it simple, keep it tangible, and write it down! It also doesn’t hurt to reward yourself after you reach your goal!
Get the gear. You do need some gear to get fit, but the list is pretty minimal. For most types of workouts, you need a good pair of shoes (for running, make sure to get a pair of running-specific shoes,) shorts or leggings, a good sports bra for the ladies, a t-shirt and some kind of program to follow. Fortunately for fitness enthusiasts in the present day, you can find all kinds of free content on the internet, from youtube videos to running plans (check out runnersworld.com to get started.) You can also pay for a programs that provides coaching and support. There are endless options.
Get the time. Finding time is probably the most challenging aspect of getting fit for new moms. First, I would say, start out slow. I do not recommend running or working out at all for the first six weeks after baby. There is way too much going on with your body and your emotions. Getting fit after baby is a slow process, but I have found that by a year after baby, I can accomplish my half-marathon goal. So, there is hope! As for fitting in the workouts, I have found that flexibility is the key. I have worked out during baby’s naptime, during older kids’ practices, on Saturday mornings when my husband is home, pushing a stroller, and any time I can convince the grandmas to take the kids. When you’re busy, you have to be creative and ready to go whenever you get the chance.
Get community. One of the best ways to get motivated is to find a community to keep you energized and accountable. You can usually find a running club in your community, a local fitness group or gym, or even an online group to get you started. I am so appreciative for the great community around me and the awesome ladies (and gentlemen) who have joined me on my running journey. I am so blessed by these awesome people, and so grateful to count them as my friends, as well as workout buddies.
Get going! And, that’s it! Don’t make excuses. Buy the shoes, put them on, and get moving. Sometimes it’s two steps forward and one step back, but you’re still moving forward. It doesn’t have to look the same for everyone, but it is possible to get fit after baby!
Yesterday morning I headed to the Dollar General for ibuprofen, new toothbrushes, and Clorox wipes after our second bout with strep throat in a couple of weeks. While I was standing there, half-awake from a long night up with the baby, the young lady in front of me handed the cashier a couple of lighters. The checkout lady proceeded to card the girl, because apparently you need to be 21 to buy lighters in Pennsylvania. The girl rolled her eyes and the cashier noted that it was ridiculous. Once you’re 18, you should be able to do what you want. She looked at me after the girl left and said, “Man, I would love to be 18 again! That was the best time of my life!”
I thought about it quickly and wondered for a brief moment: If I could go back, would I? And it didn’t take me long to say, “No way! I’d do it over again, but if I had to choose between being 18 and being 37, I’d rather be 37!”
Don’t get me wrong, when I was 18, I had a good life. I had great parents and a boyfriend and I got to go to college, which I loved, but on the other hand– I remember a lot of pressure at that time of my life. I don’t know if it is the life stage or just my immature personality that I’m remembering, but I remember so much of life around that age being about performing and proving myself. It was all about getting good grades and the fastest race times and figuring out how to jump through all of the hoops and obstacles set before me. It was an exciting time, but it was difficult. I also remember that as far as teen culture goes, I was a fish out of water. I never liked late nights or parties or loud music or tons of socializing. It just wasn’t me.
Now 37 has its challenges, too. I mean– strep throat and all-nighters with babies and shopping for ibuprofen are also not very fun. It’s also hard feeling like I don’t have much time left for me. There are still interests I would like to pursue and goals I’d like to reach. And there’s still pressure. Whenever you care about anything (and there are many things I care about deeply, especially my family) there is a certain amount of pressure to get things right and do your best.
But overall? That myopic focus on me and my accomplishments is missing from 37. And it’s great! It’s great to be able to work hard and do my best and not have to be looking for kudos all the time from other people. Thirty-seven is a much more confident age for me, an age where I feel like I know why I’m doing what I’m doing and I don’t need everyone around me to approve of me. There’s a certain amount of freedom at 37 that I don’t take for granted.
I was talking to my (similarly-minded) friend not too long ago, and she commiserated with me. High school probably wasn’t the best time for our personality traits to shine. Now our 30’s? They’ve been pretty good. Of course, I can’t speak for what the future holds. I hope that the wisdom I gain as I age will make up for some of the hardships that will inevitably come. I think personality-wise, I’d make a great 60 year old. (Don’t laugh too hard.) But for now, I’d rather be 37!
I remember not too long ago when the days really went by slowly. When I had only preschoolers and babies at home, there were days that truly seemed long, and I would catch myself wondering how to fill the hours until bedtime. I felt like I had to invent things for us to do. But that’s not the stage of life I’m living in now. I still have a baby and a preschooler in the house, but I also have a teenager and three school-aged children, and life is going FAST.
The month of May, especially, tends to get packed with fun activities. Baseball, dance recitals, doctor appointments, end of school celebrations, church activities… Now I find myself wondering how I can possibly find time to feed everyone dinner before throwing them into bed at the day’s end.
Even with all of that fun, I still find myself sometimes wondering if there is something more we should be doing. Should I push the girls to do softball? Would the kids get more out of going to actual school? Should the kids start an instrument? Learn Spanish? And, when I see the great things other families are doing, I wonder and start questioning if we are doing enough. I can start to have a major fear of missing out.
But, wanting to live my life like other people seems like a silly way to spend my time. Our family is ours, and we have our own dynamics to work with and our own values to pursue. When we are invited to participate in a new project or activity, I’ve started to view these invitations as opportunities instead of obligations. “Opportunities” sounds like something we could do if it makes sense for our season of life, and our obligations are actually much simpler than we realize.
We really only have to feed and clothe the children, make sure they can read and write and do math, and help them to love God and people. That’s pretty much it. When I can view my calendar as being filled with really cool opportunities, instead of being ruled by heavy obligations, the pressure comes off. Our calendar doesn’t have to be quite as complicated as I can make it out to be in my mind.
In the month of May, I’ve resolved– I’m going to let go of some of the frenzy. We might be busy, but if I can keep some perspective on what’s important, I think I just might survive.
Birds are amazing navigators of space. The arctic tern, for example, can fly from the North Pole to the South Pole as it migrates approximately 24,000 miles in a year. Many migratory birds can fly from their home to a wintering place hundreds or thousands of miles away and then return to the exact same spot for the spring and summer. Scientists assume that these birds have been given an internal magnetic compass, along with a superior sense of the space around them. I think they are amazing.
They are especially amazing to me, because when God made me, he chose to leave these amazing senses completely to the birds. We recently went to Florida as a family (and had a great time) and the kids and Stephen got a kick while teasing me about my poor sense of direction. We went on lots and lots of family walks and without my usual landmarks to guide me, I was basically traveling blind. They had a particularly fun time making me lead the way out of Sea World at the end of the day. Despite the fact that it wasn’t my first time being there, I led my family the wrong way pretty much every time I turned. In fact, if I had picked the exact opposite of my instinct every time, I would have led us straight out of the park.
It’s funny, because while God chose to omit a sense of direction from me, he did give me an extra-sharp sense to make up for it. I’m really, really good at sensing time. At the end of the day, if my husband doesn’t call me, I call him just to touch base before he drives home. I have an uncanny ability to call him at the exact moment he enters his car. We joke that I have a secret camera installed in his vehicle and that I am watching him at all times. He gets a little creeped out by this. (Ha ha.)
I am not sure why or how I developed this sense of time, but it is a trait I want to nurture. I think being aware of the passage of time can give us a strong sense that time is short and life is fleeting. And pondering those things is good.
How can we know what is truly valuable to give our time to if we don’t consider its fleeting nature? Psalm 90:12 declares: “Teach us to number our days that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” When we consider time, we become wise. We ponder our humanity and our mortality. We search for something bigger than our temporary nature. We look for God. Time goes fast. Let that guide how we navigate time, hopefully better than my sense of direction guides me through space!
What if– there’s been an accident, he’s not coming home?
What if- I end up raising these kids alone?
What if I can’t, if I’m too weak?
Funny how fast and far just one thought can leap.
So I reign it back in, or at least I try.
Why do I keep looking to the future with dread?
Why can’t I remember what Jesus said?
Oh, something like–
I’m always with you
Do not fear.
I’m your strength, your shield.
When life gets hard, I’ll hold you up.
Why can’t I remember?
He’s been faithful to me every day of my life.
Sometimes it’s hard for me to see, but I know
God has always been good to me.
And so, I’ll remind myself, day after day,
moment to moment if that’s what it takes.
Jesus loves me.
I’d like to share two passages that I think remind us to be filled with hope when we look to the future, and not filled with fear.
Hebrews 6: 17-19a
So when God wanted to make the unchanging nature of His purpose very clear to the heirs of the promise, He guaranteed it with an oath. This by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled to take hold of the hope before us may be strongly encouraged.
And we have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure.
Luke 1:26-38
26 In the sixth month of Elizabeth’s pregnancy, God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a town in Galilee, 27 to a virgin pledged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of David. The virgin’s name was Mary. 28 The angel went to her and said, “Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you.”
29 Mary was greatly troubled at his words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be. 30 But the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary; you have found favor with God. 31 You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you are to call him Jesus. 32 He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, 33 and he will reign over Jacob’s descendants forever; his kingdom will never end.”
34 “How will this be,” Mary asked the angel, “since I am a virgin?”
35 The angel answered, “The Holy Spirit will come on you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called[b] the Son of God. 36 Even Elizabeth your relative is going to have a child in her old age, and she who was said to be unable to conceive is in her sixth month. 37 For no word from God will ever fail.”
38 “I am the Lord’s servant,” Mary answered. “May your word to me be fulfilled.” Then the angel left her.
From this: Let’s remember to put our hope in God. He will do what He has promised!
A sweet lady at church asked me if I was going to write another blog post soon. My hands are literally full of the baby most of the day, so it’s more difficult to write than usual, but the truth is that I usually write when I need to process something hard or when my emotions are more stirred up, and lately? I have just been living in survival mode and staying on the shallow end of life. (Think- laundry, dishes, homeschool, chauffeuring, and I Love Lucy at night. Oh, and the occasional bowl of chocolate ice cream when called for.)
But, God doesn’t let us stay in the shallow end of the pool for too long. So, I’m back to writing at least for today.
Today, I’m very aware of my own sinfulness and need for grace. Not in a bad, beat- yourself-up sort of a way, but more in a man-I’m-thankful-for-God’s-grace sort of way. You see, when I get stressed, my temptation is to try to control and to worry. I don’t even recognize when I start doing it, because the lines between being responsible and being over- responsible sometimes blur. But, when I start having a hard time sleeping at night and my stomach starts hurting, I have a pretty idea that I’ve crossed that line somewhere.
Being a mom is a wonderful job. It’s fulfilling and a great privilege to be walking alongside these little people and to see them grow and to get to teach them important things. But, sometimes it’s hard. Sometimes our kids have bad attitudes and make bad choices. Sometimes, they sin. (Anyone who tells you that kids are born free of sin and its effects is lying. Or has never met a child.)
Recently, one of my kids started down the road that I have visited many times– The Road of Worry. The Road of Worry looks like a very promising road to go down. It looks safe and responsible and right. But, you know what I’ve learned about The Worry Road? It keeps going for a very long way, and if you keep going on it, you end up in the Land of Anxiety.
It’s an awful place to visit, and once you’re there, you have kind of forgotten the way home. But, for some of us, it is a tempting road to travel.
As a mom, when one of my kids is not feeling the best or making the best decisions, it is also tempting for me to want to take that on myself. When my kids struggle, it feels like it’s my fault. Especially when they struggle the same way I struggle and I see my own sin patterns repeated, I can start feeling insecure in my own parenting and to start worrying myself.
But I have to remind myself that grace is greater. It always, always is. And sometimes, it becomes more obvious how great grace is when we need it more. The struggle is real, but so is God.
I’m not trying to be dramatic or to say that we are in the depths of despair in our house. We aren’t. We are just a house full of people who sin sometimes and who get on each other’s nerves and who are in need of a Savior, and this morning, I’m aware of that need.
This song was playing in my mind this morning in the shower. (Does anyone else have a soundtrack playing in the background of their mind? Or only me?) Regardless, it’s worth sharing:
From P.P. Bliss:
My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought! My sin, not in part but the whole Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, o my soul!
It is well (it is well) With my soul (with my soul) It is well, it is well with my soul
I hate going to the doctor’s office, and I hate hospitals. I absolutely appreciate the medical care that you can receive at a hospital, but nonetheless, if I want my blood pressure to go up, I merely have to step inside the door of a doctor’s office. Maybe my dislike and anxiety about medical care is because hospitals and doctors’ offices are usually places you go to when something is wrong. I mean, you go to the doctor, and you’re either running a fever, or you’re vomiting, or your face is swelling up from a bee sting. No wonder nobody likes to go there.
So, the only time I have really been to the hospital is when I have had my babies. Now, this is overall a joyful time, so that has made these experiences better than most hospital stays, but having a baby still comes with a certain amount of anxiety and monitoring that make the whole experience a bit unpleasant (at least for me.) With the birth of my sixth baby (Welcome to the world Noah Samuel Laudermilch!) I tried to observe the workings of the hospital from a different angle—with a little bit of humor.
The funniest thing about the hospital when you have just had a baby is the number of times that the staff comes into your room over the next 24 hours. I found this to be hilarious. It went something like this: The nurse leaves after checking on you and the baby and tells you to get some rest. You close your eyes for a few minutes, grateful that you can finally be alone with your baby and husband. The lights are dim and you’re drifting off to sleep, when
“Housekeeping! Is it all right if I just sanitize the room?” (It’s 6 in the morning.) The housekeeper takes up the laundry, runs around the room for a few minutes, wiping down some surfaces that probably didn’t need to be wiped down. She leaves. You close your eyes again.
Fifteen minutes later, “Nutrition group! Can I interest you in our parent’s special this evening? Or is it something you would prefer for lunch? Your menu choices are chicken cordon blue and steak (hospital steak, mind you,) or perhaps pasta?” You pick out chicken cordon blue and close your eyes.
“Time to check your vitals!” The nurse walks in, puts the blood pressure cuff on you, takes your temperature and walks out again. You begin to wonder if you will ever get that nap you were so desperate for. You assume not and turn on the t.v. instead.
Five minutes later: “Let’s take a look at the baby now,” says the pediatrician. The doctor then proceeds to stretch the baby out, check his reflexes, ask about his feeding, and then hand him back to you. You look at your husband and start to giggle, because the whole thing is starting to seem a little bit funny to you.
You turn off the t.v., close your eyes one more time again, and a lady in leopard print pants walks into your room and announces “Hello, Rachel!” (I’m Elisabeth.) “I’m from the United Way, and I want to educate you about the programs we have in your town. Now, what county are you from?” I look at her, feeling like a telemarketer has just entered my hospital room less than 12 hours after I gave birth and reply shortly, “I’m not interested.” She looks a little confused and put out, but I’m beyond caring. She leaves the room.
When the midwife comes in again, I request to go home as soon as possible. She agrees. Hospitals are no place to rest after having a baby. This little scenario plays out every few hours over the next 12 hours, until I am chomping at the bit to go home so I can finally get some rest with my five kids in the house!
I am absolutely grateful for the care I have received for me and my family over the years from some really great doctors and hospitals, but to truly appreciate the hospital experience, you definitely need a good sense of humor!
I sometimes wonder how in the world I have made it to this point in my life. I mean– how in the world do I have five (almost six) kids, and how in the world am I surviving– even thriving–(at least some of the time?) I remember 10 years ago when I had two kids and I was overwhelmed by the daily tasks of life. And now– I’m about to have six and my life is overflowing with even more, and I’m still standing. If it all happened at once, I think I’d be drowning. But, I am learning that we don’t live our entire lives all at once. We live life one day at a time, one moment at a time. And, what a relief it is to live that way.
Life can be so overwhelming to someone who looks forward and wants to plan everything. I mean, if you take that way of doing life to its extreme, you’re pretty much planning your funeral when you’re a kid. (Not that I did that or anything– but if I did– I think irises would be a beautiful funeral flower.)
I am remembering the woman I was at the beginning of this motherhood journey, and I just want to encourage that young lady. Life can be intimidating and looking ahead to what’s next can be overwhelming. But–if we can just do the next thing that we are called to do– day by day, moment by moment– we can build amazing things. It’s how anything is built– families, houses, communities, countries. If we want to build something, the only way we can do it is by starting the job and working on it, one task at a time, until it is finished.
When I look forward to the rest of my life, I can easily get overwhelmed. How in the world am I going to raise these six kids to love God, to love other people, and to do their own laundry well? How am I ever going to civilize four little boys so that they can be mature young men with good manners? How can I raise my girls to be confident young women and wives and mothers someday? If I think about all of these goals and dreams and all of the work it will take to get there, I think I could curl right up in the fetal position in my bed and stay there, paralyzed.
But thank goodness, that’s not how we live our lives. Thank goodness God gives us one day at a time.
One day at a time, sweet Jesus Thats all I’m asking of You
Just give me the strength to do everyday What I have to do
Yesterday’s gone, sweet Jesus And tomorrow may never be mine God help me today Show me the way One day at a time
You know what I hardly ever think about throughout the course of the day? Teeth. I hardly every think about teeth. Apart from a few minutes of brushing and daily reminders for the kids to brush their teeth, oral hygiene is not usually at the front of my thoughts.
Except for the past week, when I have spent the majority of my time thinking about teeth. Did you know that you can swish coconut oil in your mouth to try to reduce tooth infections? Did you know that a pinch of dried cloves stuck next to a sore tooth can temporarily dull the pain? Have you ever walked around the house with a chamomile tea bag stuck between your teeth and cheek? No? If you have a toothache, all of the sudden, you will become super-interested in googling “tooth pain remedies” and you may spend an inordinate amount of time trying all of these things.
Pain can grab my attention like nothing else. I suppose that is overall a good thing, as I am then motivated to take care of a problem. (Don’t worry. I have been to the dentist, and it looks like I might be going back.) But, as I wait for the pain to subside, it definitely has my attention.
I feel like I am fairly tough in the face of physical pain. I have had five babies without drugs and I have run half marathons, so I feel like I can claim a certain amount of physical toughness. The biggest problem with me when I confront pain is that I want desperately to know that there is an end in sight. Fine– I have to deal with pain. Exactly for how long please, so I can move on to something better?
During my first baby’s birth, I remember asking my nurse HOW MUCH LONGER the whole process was going to last. She was encouraging, but definitely did not give me a timeline, which was probably wise. But it was so hard for me to stay in the pain without trying to get away from it. I just wanted to experience the pain and get over it and move on. How much longer?
Unfortunately, pain doesn’t work like that. When we’re in it, we’re in it and we don’t always get to control when it leaves us. I think this is the same with physical pain and emotional pain, as well. It is a fact of life that we are going to experience pain on this earth at one time or another. And, nobody can really tell us how long that pain is going to last.
But, eventually, in my experience, pain usually comes to an end. Stomach bugs don’t last forever. Bones eventually heal. Emotional healing does occur. Labor eventually stops and babies are born. That doesn’t necessarily take away from the pain of the moment, but it is a comfort nonetheless.
There are so many beautiful Bible verses that point to the fact that pain is real and it is hard, but it will not last forever.
Like Psalm 30: Sing to the LORD, you saints of his; praise his holy name. For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime; weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.
And John 16:33: I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
As well as Romans 8:17-18: Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory. I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.
We can’t deny pain. We can’t always escape it (although I do acknowledge the wonders of tylenol!) And sometimes we might come near to despair. Yet we have this hope if we take hold of the faith offered to us through Jesus Christ. Pain is temporary, even when it seems interminable. Glory awaits.
And now, it’s time to go and put an ice pack on my face!
I think the pandemic is finally coming to a close. I could be wrong, I suppose, but it seems as if the majority of people in our country are getting back to normal, whether Covid is gone or not. (And, the illness itself does seem to be subsiding- at least for now.) All I can say is– it’s about time! It has been great to have events that we didn’t have last year, and it has been great to travel a little, and it has been absolutely super to go to stores maskless without feeling like a criminal. At least that is how it has been in northeastern Pennsylvania. (It does seem that New York state is determined to hold onto the pandemic for a bit longer based on my grocery shopping trip there yesterday.)
So, now that we are inching toward normal– what exactly comes next? Do we all just pick up where we left off? Do we jump back into the same activities we used to participate in pre-covid days? Do we stop being so vigilant about every sniffle? Do we pretend that nothing has changed during the past two years?
We have experienced so much drama over the past two years– from illness and death to societal upheaval, that jumping seamlessly back into our old lives does not seem possible to me right now. We now have grocery shortages and teacher shortages and nurses being fired for not getting booster shots. We have students who can’t read, and we have college students who are forced to jump through more and more hoops to go to class. Young people have a higher suicide rate, more drug overdoses, and our cities have more crime. As individuals, we have probably become more estranged within our extended families and more polarized politically. We have lost friendships and lost touch with people who were once important to us, and of course, we have also lost people directly to Covid. And, we have lost a lot of trust in our institutions. (Or at least I have.)
So, it seems like getting back to normal is going to take a little time.
I am not an expert on trauma or healing or anything like that. I don’t have much to offer in the way of helping people to “heal.” So, I don’t have any really wise words on this topic.
The main thing I am thinking at this point is that we have got to get honest with one another if we expect to rebuild things to what they once were. We have to be honest about the ways we have hurt our society throughout the past two years. If we want to rebuild our institutions and culture, we can’t hide the truth about mistakes that we have made.
In Christianity, “forgiveness” is one of the essential doctrines of the faith. In the Lord’s prayer, we ask that God “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” (Ha ha. I think I’d rather ask for unconditional forgiveness.) So, I know that forgiveness is something we are called to do collectively.
But, I don’t think that offering forgiveness is the same thing as restoring trust. I would say that the way that the past two years have changed me the most is to make me much less trusting of our society’s institutions- schools, government, media, you name it. Probably, this is just part of “growing up” for me, and possibly most people experience this as part of the human experience. But, I think a lack of trust is a huge problem facing our country. How are we going to rebuild a good society without trust? Are we ready for the work that rebuilding trust will entail? Because, it’s going to take a hefty dose of honesty, and being honest with ourselves is not an easy task. I found this quote by Warren Buffet about honesty to be intriguing, ““Trust is like the air we breathe. When it’s present, nobody really notices. But when it’s absent, everybody notices.” I am going to bet that a lack of trust in our society is the biggest problem we are facing as a culture. If we want to survive as a culture, we have to rebuild trust– and the only way we can do that is by getting honest, admitting our failures, and being trustworthy. If we are going to have a society where we trust one another, then we have to deserve it first.
My life has been taken over by boys. For the first part of my motherhood, life was very girly. My first two girls had me re-living my childhood- dolls, Disney movies, dance, and story-books dominated our days.
But now? My three boys in a row have grown up from babies into real boys. At seven, five, and three, they have taken over our house with legos, tractors, and constant wrestling on the furniture.
My father-in-law passed down a Pennsylvania Dutch saying that I now completely understand. It goes like this: “One boy, one boy- two boys, half a boy- three boys, no boy at all.” (This is my new favorite saying.)
If I can have one-on-one time with a boy, we can get some things done. On their own, my boys pay attention and are helpful, and I can even take them shopping (!) But, in a group of three? It’s probably better to get out the wrestling mats and let them go.
I find that I am having to adjust my expectations with my little boys. I still desire to teach them to be civilized people (with God’s help!) but they are never going to be the same as my girls.
With raising boys, it’s like I get to take on an additional role to that of being a mom- I now am also the ringmaster of a circus.
This week, I had the opportunity to attend homecoming at my college alma mater, Indiana Wesleyan University. IWU is a small Christian college in Marion, Indiana, whose mission is to teach its students to become great by serving others. It really is an excellent university in regards to academics and spiritual formation, and I have some terrific memories from my time there.
While at homecoming, I had the opportunity to listen to Phil Vischer (the co-creator of Veggie Tales and the voice of Bob the Tomato and some other famous vegetables) speak during the 100-year celebration of the school, which took place this year during IWU’s 101st anniversary, because– Covid. Throughout his address, he entertained us with humorous stories and funny voices, but somehow still managed to convey a serious message.
He talked about—what else—Covid and what a game-changer this virus has been for our country. He pointed out that the C-19 pandemic has led to the greatest loss of life in our country since the 1918 Spanish flu and our great World Wars. Phil went on to say that the biggest change he has felt since the pandemic began is this growing awareness that people are not actually in control of the world, as much as we would like to think we are. He talked about growing up in the 1980’s and 1990’s and his sense that in America, we were on our way to permanent good times. Life was getting better, science was conquering, and politics (and Ronald Reagan) would save the day. And now? That feeling is gone.
I resonated with what he was saying. We have had good times for most of the time when I was growing up. Until 9/11 and now the Covid-19 pandemic, the world has felt somewhat secure on this side of the Atlantic. But, as Phil pointed out, “secure” is not the normal state of the world. If we thought our country was bringing in the Glorious Millennium, that illusion has certainly been crushed during the past two years. The world has been broken for a long time now, and it looks like we aren’t fixing that.
I don’t mean that humans are entirely helpless creatures in the face of the world’s brokenness. I believe that God has given us some agency over our environment. I believe he has given us brains and tools to use that can certainly help us to overcome difficulties—but our response to the pandemic, in my way of thinking—has been to imagine that we are the masters of our destiny. It’s like if we just figure out the right way to do things, the right policies to apply, the right amount of pressure to put on people—then we succeed. Except, here we are, two years later, and it doesn’t seem like we have quite achieved our goals. I think that we have had so much success with scientific breakthroughs and technology that somewhere along the way, we have actually bought into the idea that we can fix the world if we try hard enough.
I think that losing our sense of control of the world has been one of the most difficult aspects of the pandemic for many people. But, maybe, that doesn’t have to be all bad. Carrying the world in our human strength is a heavy burden. Better policies won’t fix the world, more rules won’t get it done, and certainly more government is not going to solve our problems (please say you agree with me on that point!) But, isn’t there some freedom in that? Isn’t there some peace in acknowledging our limitations?
Maybe we have to come to the end of ourselves in order to find something bigger than ourselves. Maybe we have to see how fragile and puny we are before we can conceive of a God who is big enough to carry the world.
A few years ago, I wrote a blog post entitled “Why We Send Our Kids to Public School.” In the article, I outlined our most compelling reasons for sending our kids to the local public school, although I was certainly not dogmatic in that approach. I wrote from the perspective that being involved in public education is an opportunity to be involved with and support the local community, making the public schools better for the entire community. I still believe in this concept.
And yet, I obviously am living in tension about this issue, because instead of staying in the system, we are opting out for the second year in a row. A year and a half of Covid and mitigation and political upheaval have rocked the world (or at least my perspective of it.) I have struggled with the concept that sometimes for reasons beyond their control (or will) public schools may become more about following the “politics” than listening to the parents of the children that they serve.
After the initial shut-downs of the schools in the spring of 2020, as schools attempted to find their way back, my school sent out a survey to parents asking them what their preferences were in regards to handling Covid. In my school district, the answers overwhelmingly came from the same perspectives. Our school fully intended to honor those ideas. Until the PA governor started throwing down mandates. Now, our public school had their hands tied, and parents’ preferences were not going to be honored.
So, with the uncertainty of the new school year, in regards to mitigation, shut-downs, and online learning, albeit with some reservations, we pulled our kids from public school for our first year of homeschooling. I do not regret it. It was busy, it was a lot of work, and there were some trade-offs, but in many ways– it was very good for our family. Throughout the year, I have developed a new appreciation for the concept of homeschooling, which I am not going to get into in this blog post. You are welcome to read more about our experience with homeschooling here.
Back to the public schools. I’ll be honest. Throughout Covid, I lost a ton of trust in our institutions. What I saw (from the perspective of a plebeian, folks) is people pretending that “doing something” would somehow make Covid go away, even if they knew that “something” was not doing much of anything. Flimsy masks, random quarantines for healthy students, and “distancing” with kindergartners were illogical strategies to me and to many others in my community. But, the show had to go on.
Watching this drama play out, with parents on one side, politics on the other, and our school, at least, somewhere in between, all of the questions I have about education in general just started piling up, the essential one being: Are our public schools merely the arm of some political machine? Or are they there to support parents in educating their children?
Because, this basic question goes further than Covid mitigation measures. It also pertains to curriculum, teaching strategies, values education, how money is spent, and a host of other issues. Now, I get democracy, and I get that my views may be in the minority in some places, and I get that sometimes the public school may not represent my views. I understand that it is still possible to send my kids to public school and to explain different viewpoints to them at home.
But, if I send my kids to a school that will form their experiences and influence their thinking for years to come, I need to feel that they at least have my interests in mind. I need to know that they are listening to their communities and that their priority is their students. Right now, I don’t feel that public schools are doing that.
Right now, schools in my state are again being asked to decide how they will handle Covid for another year. Each school is asked to post their “Health and Safety Plan” “in a language that parents/caregivers can understand.” Our school has currently decided on the plan to “abide by, to the maximum extent possible, the current health and Department of Education, and other applicable laws and regulations safety guidelines and recommendations for schools as issued by the Center for Disease Control, the Pennsylvania Department of Health, the Pennsylvania Department of Education, and other applicable laws and regulations.” That’s the plan, and of course, that plan is incentivized by pandemic relief funds.
What does this mean for the 2021-2022 school year in my neck of the woods? I guess it means that students aged twelve and under will be masking up again in September, despite living totally normal lives all summer. I guess it means that all students must be vaccinated against Covid, risk profile aside, before they will shed their masks, or perhaps, before they will be welcomed back to school. I guess this means that my school will be complying to the utmost with whatever new mandate floats down from on high.
Or perhaps it means that parents will try even harder to make their voices heard and that the schools will again understand that the purpose of public education is to support parents in educating their children, not to make all of the decisions for them. I don’t know. I will try to continue engaging in my community by showing up for local elections, by writing my principal and superintendent and school board about the issues I see, and I will try to make my voice heard. Someday, we may send our kids back to the public school.
But either way, they are our kids. They are our responsibility, and it is our job to do what we think is best for them. No matter how we choose to educate our kids, we need do what is right for the little people under our care. And, I hope our schools will do the same.
I am not good at driving. Specifically, I am not good at driving on highways with lots of cars whizzing in and out of their lanes. If anything gives me an anxiety attack, it is highway driving. The problem is, I grew up on a dirt road in rural Pennsylvania and all of my formative driving was on two-lane roads. My driving skills include braking for deer and slowing down around corners. Changing lanes and joining traffic are not in my skill-set.
So, when we went to Tennessee for our 15th anniversary trip this last week, my husband did all of the driving. Now, I do realize that if I don’t actually practice interstate driving, then I won’t get any better. But, for the sanity and safety of both of us, he did the driving, and we were both happy.
That is, until I decided I didn’t like the way he was driving and I tried to “help” him. For some reason, he never responds that well to my driving advice. I helpfully suggested that he should slow down here, that he shouldn’t pass that car there, and that he should pretty much cower in the right lane and hope nobody would join traffic (like I would, if I were driving.) I thought he should appreciate and heed my advice, but somehow, it didn’t seem to accomplish what I hoped.
I am grateful to say we made it home alive from our trip with our car (and marriage) intact. But, the whole “driving” episode got me thinking about giving up control (and how I’m not very good at that.) I find that, in life, I tend to be just like I am in the passenger seat of a car. I don’t really like driving the car until things aren’t going the way I think they should. I like the idea of God being in control when things are going well. When circumstances go south, I like to take back control of things for myself. Phrases like “Trust God” seem pretty annoying when I feel like I could or should do things better.
There is, I think, a balance when it comes to trusting God and making decisions. I do think he expects me to do my part along the highway of life. He might even want me to drive sometimes. But, ultimately, I find in the Bible that God is in control of my life, a whole lot more than I am. He’s the driver, and I’m the passenger.
Proverbs 3:5-6 is probably one of the most well-known Bible verses that encourages me to “Trust the Lord with all your hear and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths.”
A passage from James says: “Now listen, you who say, ‘Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.’ Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.” As it is, you boast in your arrogant schemes. All such boasting is evil.” (James 4:13-16.)
And, Jesus himself addresses our need to trust God throughout the New Testament, but specifically in this passage about worrying from Matthew:
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?”
And, so I come to the same conclusion. Sometimes, I may want to think I have complete control of my life, but in the end, I’m not driving, and my worrying and fussing in the passenger seat isn’t really helping anyone. Do I really want to be a backseat driver? Or is it time to kick up my feet in the passenger seat and enjoy the scenery? Life is a wild ride, but there’s a good God, and let’s be thankful that he’s driving (and I’m not!)
Sometimes, this world seems crazy. I mean, all you have to do is to turn on the news and let the events of the world ruin your day. Even my own little world can throw its challenges my way. Juggling the kids with their schoolwork and the housework is enough to drive me bonkers on a given day. (I swear I am going to have to change my name. I think I heard “Mommy!” at least 300 times today.)
We have been home for three days now with a virus– nothing bad– but you know– in the days of Covid, if you have a runny nose, it seems like a good idea to stay home. Even while homeschooling and quarantining and everything during this stage of life, it is unusual for us to stay home for three days in a row. We like to be on the go, meeting up with friends, or heading to lessons, or whatever.
But a few days of slow can be good for the soul. By day #3, I have spent a little more time noticing the small moments of the day that I can treasure in my heart.
There is not much of a better sound than a two year old boy belly-laughing on the swing-set as you push him and tickle him.
There was a beautiful sunset if you looked out your window this evening.
And, hearing a song on the radio? I mean, it’s not mind-blowing exciting, but the right song at the right moment can still make me cry.
If I take the time to notice, these little moments are small gifts scattered throughout my day.
What are you grateful for today? What are the moments that you notice and that anchor you and that give you purpose to do the hard things that are required of you?
Beautiful moments are there, I think, even in difficult seasons of life. God, grant us eyes to see them.
I didn’t think I would have the opportunity to try out homeschooling with our kids. We had committed to having our kids attend the local public school for various reasons, which I wrote about in an earlierblog post. And then, out of nowhere came 2020. The biggest change in our lives, by far, was having the kids’ school shut down at the end of the 2019/2020 school year. We went from having three kids attending school five days a week (with two preschoolers at home) to five kids at home together every day, adapting to a very sudden life-change. We set up a table in our basement and finished up fun projects that the kids were in the middle of when they left school. We wrote letters to their teachers and got on Zoom meetings for the first time. We learned to use Google Classroom and tried to get our bearings. It was disorienting to have so much change so fast, especially when the kids weren’t able to say goodbye to friends or teachers or to have any closure for the school year.
Homeschooling in the Basement- March 2019
Of course, we thought at the time that the pandemic disruptions would be short-lived. We thought for sure that everything would be back to “normal” in September. When we started to get the idea that school as we knew it was over for a time, we adapted. We knew Zoom and Google classroom were not how we wanted our kids to learn, and we knew the ping-pong of back and forth to in-person school or hybrid school was not for us either. We wanted something we could count on, so we turned to homeschooling for the first time. With some help and guidance from our homeschooling friends and family, we withdrew our kids from public school, ordered curriculum, and started “school” in August.
I don’t regret it. While homeschooling has not always been smooth or stress-free, it has been good for us and our family. There are some things about homeschooling that I actually like better than public schooling, although there are, of course, trade-offs. We are currently 125 days in, and I have had a few people ask me what a “typical” day of homeschooling looks like for us, so I thought I would share that here.
This is a “typical” day of homeschooling for a family of seven.
Morning Time
My hands-down favorite part of a homeschooling day is the morning. Pre-covid days, getting the kids ready for school was my least favorite part of the day. It was drag the grumpy kids out of bed, make sure they get dressed, shove a box of cereal their way, warm up the car, and hustle out the door as various children cried about spelling tests. Homeschooling mornings are much more relaxed. Typically, the kids start to roll out of bed at 7:30- 8:00. (Daddy is usually already gone for the day.) They start their day with their “morning boxes,” personalized boxes with coloring books and stickers and gel pens that they can use while I start my morning with a quiet time of Bible reading (quiet being a relative term.) If I am feeling particularly indulgent, I let them watch a half an hour show in the morning, but I am trying to get away from that habit. After the first half-hour, everyone gets dressed, does their morning chores, and I make a hot breakfast. We usually sit down to breakfast by 8:30 or 9, and I will read an assigned Bible passage to them, as well as a little history out of our North American Indian Prayer Guide (Sonlight curriculum.) Breakfast is a really good time to read out loud with them, as the little ones are occupied with food and stay pretty quiet for a few minutes.
After breakfast, it’s on to the “Core” subjects. The girls (3rd and 5th grade) read independently while I grab my little guy (1st grade) to read out loud to me. We probably spend about 20 or 30 minutes reading, and then the kids troop downstairs to our homeschool table, where they start on math. Math is probably the most stressful part of our day, as we attempt to have three kids complete it at the same time, with two toddlers running around, but, overall, we are doing a better job, especially the little ones. Once finished with math, the kids move on to language arts, where they complete some writing, spelling and grammar exercises before they finish up their “table subjects,” hopefully before lunch time.
The Girls on the 100th Day of School, Really Showing their Age!
Afternoon
While the kids finish up their work, I usually run back upstairs to make some kind of lunch. We’ll have leftovers or sandwiches or something easy. We sit down and eat together, and we may read a little more out loud, depending on the day’s assignments. After lunch, we’ll clean up and the kids will have some time to play before we finish up school for the day. The girls will read science independently or will finish up any extra assignments, whether that’s writing a research paper or practicing piano. I put the little ones down for a nap, and it’s fairly quiet in the house for an hour! I usually try to get a workout in during naptime. If all goes well, we are done with school by two or three with plenty of breaks sprinkled throughout.
Note the Toddler Tears!
Evening
By the time we get to the end of the day, the house can be a mess. Pre-covid days, I could clean without kids running everywhere. Post-covid days, there is a herd of kids in my house All. Day. Long. And, so, we are learning to utilize the workforce that is already in the house. I frequently make my kids do something called the “five minute clean-up.” When things start to get too out of hand, I’ll set a timer, and everyone cleans something for at least five minutes. This strategy seems to work very well for us and keeps things in our house from getting too out of hand! The girls also have to do their own laundry, and I am teaching my first grader to start his own (with varying amounts of success.) If we complete all of those things in a day, and the house isn’t in a state of severe decline at the end of a day, I call it a win!
Daddy usually comes home about 6 pm, so we wait to eat dinner until then. Lately our evenings have also been full of activities, so we find that our days are full, and the kids are going to bed much later than we used to (9:30!) Thankfully, late nights don’t stress me out as much, when I know we can sleep in the next day. We usually end our day with reading a longer book out loud as a family, and have read through some classics that I think the kids will remember for a long time (I hope, fondly.)
Honestly, not every day of homeschooling looks exactly the same. Some days, we have piano lessons or grocery shopping, or get-togethers with friends squeezed in; sometimes, the kids do school in the car or catch up on work after dinner. I don’t think we keep a set “schedule” exactly, but we do have these basic routines that help us to manage everything.
I would also not like to give the impression that our homeschool goes perfectly day in and day out. We deal with our fair share of teasing and fighting and crying over schoolwork. We have bad attitudes and get on each other’s nerves. We’re not perfect; homeschooling is not perfect. And, I’m perfectly okay with that. We’re reading, we’re learning, and we’re growing. For now, it’s good. I’m not sure if this is what a homeschooling day “should” look like, but it is what it does look like for us. And, we are doing our best to have a great new “normal” even if it looks a lot different from what “normal” used to look like for our family.
Sometimes, reading the Bible is boring. If you’ve ever attempted to read the Bible in a year, you’ll know what I mean. You start out really strong in Genesis with the creation story and Abraham and the flood, then you fly through Exodus with Moses and Joshua, and then somewhere in Leviticus, your eyes start to glaze over. For me, by the time I get to the passage about how to cleanse your house from mold (Leviticus 14,) I keep reading by sheer willpower alone (or I quit and pick up a good novel.) Sometimes, reading the Bible is tedious, even though I still believe that it has immense value for me (who knew you could learn how to clean up mold from the Bible?)
Sometimes, though, reading the Bible a literary delight. I’ve been following the She Reads Truth app for my daily devotional reading in the morning, and we are currently reading through the book of Esther. We also happen to be reading Esther as part of our Bible reading for homeschool in the morning. This book has the kids glued to the story and me laughing at the details included in this book of the Bible.
Esther follows the story of a young Jewish girl named Hadassah, living in the Persian city of Susa. (Esther is Hadassah’s Persian name.) Esther is an orphan girl, being raised by her Uncle Mordecai, and she happens to be one of the most beautiful ladies in all of the land, which is extremely important as the king of Persia is in great need of a (gorgeous) queen.
The book of Esther introduces a very happy King Xerxes, celebrating all of his fabulous wealth and accomplishments with 180 days of partying. As the story goes, “King Xerxes was very happy because he had been drinking much wine” (Esther 1:10.) His happiness is short-lived, however, because his wife, the rebellious Queen Vashti, refuses to come and be paraded around in front of his guests. Of course, the vain king is very insulted by his wife’s disobedience and after talking with his guys, decides to banish her from his presence and replace her with a new queen.
Enter Esther. Esther, along with all of the most beautiful virgins of the land are rounded up and sent to the king’s harem, and the one who pleases the king the most will be his queen. (Kind of reminds me of The Bachelor.)
So, Esther continues with beauty treatments and in a stroke of luck, is chosen to be the next Mrs. Xerxes. As the book continues, Esther faces new trials and temptations, as her life and the life of her people are soon threatened by the vengeful Haman, who carries a grudge against Uncle Mordecai, in particular, and the Jewish people in general. The drama reaches a crescendo when Haman convinces the King to destroy all of the Jews living in Susa and Esther must wrestle with what she must do. Uncle Mordecai convinces her to act beyond her fears, as he tells her ““Do not think that because you are in the king’s house you alone of all the Jews will escape. For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father’s family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?” (Esther 4:13-14).
And so the beautiful Esther (in her royal robes) asks her King to come to a banquet she has prepared for him, where she hits him with the news that his most trusted advisor is trying to kill her and her family. King Xerxes runs out of the building when he hears this, apparently overcome by his emotions. In the meantime, Haman falls down at Esther’s feet while she is reclining on the couch , and when Xerxes comes back in, he thinks Haman is “violat[ing] the queen while [he] is in the room”! Suffice it to say that things do not end well for Haman, although Mordecai and Esther end up as heroes and Esther’s brave actions save her people from destruction.
The story closes with King Xerxes imposing taxes on his subjects (sounds about right) while the Jewish people celebrate what God did through Esther and Mordecai. Today, this celebration is called the festival of Purim.
This little drama (nestled between Nehemiah and Job) is a literary gem. If you’re stuck right about now in your Bible reading plan and need a break from all of the rules and regulations, you might give the book of Esther a try. (I think you’ll find it might even be better than The Bachelor!)
Like any basic American woman, I started my New Year with Big Goals and good intentions. I would love to lose a few pounds, get organized, be stronger in my faith, and be a better wife and mom. Of course, we all know where good intentions usually lead.
Since I want my resolutions to be more than good intentions, I’ve started my new year with a stack of books that have been encouraging me to develop better rhythms and habits. So far this year, I have read three books on habits (and I’m in the middle of a fourth.) Hal Elrod’s Miracle Morning, Rod Dreher’s The Benedict Option, Justin Earley’s The Common Rule, and Sarah Clarkson’s Book Girl are all encouraging me to develop better habits in this new year.
The thing I like about these books is that they all encourage people to form small habits in order to make big changes in our lives. Miracle Morning (my least favorite of the the three) is still an extremely practical book for encouraging readers to put first things first in the morning. Elrod puts forth the idea that getting up early to work on self-development is the keystone habit that can change the whole trajectory of a life. Specifically, he outlines the SAVERS routine that has changed his life– a morning filled with silence, affirmation, exercise, reading, and scribing. This popular book (which has sold over 2.5 million copies) lays out a simple formula that anyone can follow (if only they can stop hitting the snooze button on their alarm.) I found this book to be somewhat inspiring, although, as a mom with young kids, I personally disagree with his stance that sleep should be sacrificed in order to complete the SAVERS routine. I have also found that when I wake up, the kids wake up shortly after, no matter what time that is, so I happily stay in bed longer and then complete my own morning routine a little later in the day, even if I do so with a child latched onto my leg. For me, the SAVERS routine could become more of a burden than a help, but I do appreciate that the habits he promotes are life-giving and life-changing.
Dreher’s Benedict Option takes a faith-filled approach to changing habits. The premise of this provocative book is that Christianity is under attack in the West, and because of this assault, Christians need to deepen their faith walk through historical practices. Dreher encourages Christians to heed the wisdom of past faith practices in order to build a Christian culture that is resilient to the siren call of the mainstream secular movement– practices of “order, prayer, work, asceticism, stability, community, hospitality, and balance.” According to Dreher, “Love is the only way we will make it through what is to come. Love is not romantic ectasy. It has to be a kind of love that has been honed and intensified through regular prayer, fasting, and repentance and, for many Christians, through receiving the holy sacraments. And it must be a love that has been refined through suffering. There is no other way.” I found this book to be deeply encouraging in the face of great cultural change. I came away from it wanting to invest in our Christian community, right here in my own little part of the world and wanting to more seriously practice my faith.
Justin Earley’s The Common Rule is thus far my favorite book on habits and the one that will be the most likely to influence my small, daily decisions. This extremely practical book sets out some helpful habits for Christians living in modern times, some of his key habits being Scripture before phone, a kneeling prayer three times a day, one meal with others daily, a weekly fast, curating media, and Sabbath. This book skillfully tackles the problem (or opportunity, depending how you look at it) of technology and the way that technology is affecting the way people spend their time, and thus their lives. If you need some encouragement to take control of your technology habits instead of letting them control you, this would be a great book for you to read this year.
The last book, Sarah Clarkson’s Book Girl is a readers’ dream book. Her book explains the why of reading, the how of reading, as well as giving lists of book recommendations for those who need to find their next great read. So far, I know that I must read Mortimer Adler’s How to Read a Book, Wendell Berry’s Hannah Coulter, and C.S. Lewis’s Until We Have Faces. By the time I get done with Book Girl, I should be set up with books for all of 2021.
One of the single best habits that has made my life better in countless ways is reading. I might not have all the answers on how to order your life, but I can recommend that reading great books is a great way to start. During this time of year– cold, a little dreary, “quarantined,” life can get a little bit dull, and it is too easy to slip into unhealthy habits. Reading a book can interrupt that dreariness, bring a little sunshine in, and inspire us to get moving once again. If you make one resolution this year, start with reading. It’s a keystone habit that can change your life.
I have started to dream of “after” covid. I think it’s coming. Maybe, “after” will come in a few months, or it might take a few years, but sometime in the not too distant future, covid won’t come up regularly in conversation. (Won’t that be nice?!)
In my post-covid dreams, I would like to imagine that everyone will just pick up where they left off last March, when the world shut down due to the novel coronavirus, but I don’t think that dream will have much to do with reality. Covid has not just left scars on our bodies, but it has also fractured our relationships, and recovering from the damage is going to take time, just like recovering from any serious illness.
In fact, I don’t think time alone will do it. It won’t just take time. It’s going to take grace. If you’re anything like me, you may have strong opinions about how covid has been handled and what the outcomes have been. It is possible that you hold strong opinions that run exactly counter to my ideas. You may be looking at people whom you have always considered friends very differently now, wondering how they can act and behave the way the do and what is Wrong With Them. And, at the end of the day, you may be right, and they may be wrong. (I suppose it is also possible that you (ahem, I) may be wrong after all.
And, while I think it is okay– even good!– to disagree, I think we are going to have to work through our issues with grace if we are going to be healthy together once again. I’m not sure exactly how this will work out. Does this mean that we just brush our differences under the rug and move on? Does this mean we have to hash out every motivation we had when we made our pandemic plans? Do we have to argue our every point until a clear winner is projected? (That could take some time.)
Possibly, we will have to do all of those things at various times. But somehow, we’re going to have to look past the hurts and misunderstandings and disagreements and continue to offer each other grace. Because that is what Christ did for us.
Christian grace is defined as “God’s unmerited favor.” Grace is what Christ did on the cross. He came and loved us, not because we deserved it, but because He was Love. Grace cost Christ His life, and it gave us back ours.
I am sometimes (too often) tempted to dismiss people when I don’t like the way they think or act. I certainly don’t feel gracious feelings toward them or want to give them “unmerited favor.” I rather like justice being served (except of course, when it comes to me.) Then I’ll happily take grace.
But, if Christ died for me, a sinner like all of the rest, then why should I withhold grace from others?
Coming out of this pandemic and resuming relationships again is not going to be an easy task. How we do this, as Christians, has the potential to impact the world greatly for Christ. Is it possible to show the world that we can disagree on a myriad of matters while still loving one another? While still putting others’ needs before our own?
May God help me when I want to be right more than I want to love others.
Our nation has reached a major milestone that feminists the world over are cheering. Sure, they would rather that this woman occupied the most powerful seat in the land, but Kamala Harris’s vice-presidency is an amazing accomplishment for anyone. We’ve come a long way, baby!
And yet.
Is achieving great power truly the highest aspiration a woman can have? Is it because Kamala is in the White House that we can finally say that women have “made it?”
I’m going to point out something obvious here– without women and everything they have done since the beginning of time, there would be no presidency at all. Because– there would be no human race. Women are uniquely designed by God to do certain things that men cannot. Every human being that has ever lived has had a mother carry him or her around in her body for approximately nine long months and then push him out of her body in a painful experience we like to call labor. The majority of people have continued to be raised by that same woman. Throughout history, women have played a singular part in shaping all of mankind.
And, it’s just now that women have finally risen to great heights?
I don’t think so.
Women have been doing exceptional things since they were created, whether that fact is acknowledged or not. And, often it has not. Being a woman has historically not been easy. In many cultures and times, women have been seen as inferior to men, and the work that they have done has not been valued. Because of this, women have worked their tails off to compete with men for the things our culture values– namely, power and money. And, they have done well. They have proven that women can do amazing things that people used to believe that only men could do.
But, is that truly the best that we can do? Compete with men for power and money? Of course, if that position and money is used for the good of other people, then maybe we have accomplished something. But, I daresay we haven’t accomplished anything more than what ordinary women throughout history have already accomplished. What more important work is there in society than raising children to be moral, upright, confident, and secure human beings? Raising the next generation– is just as important as anything Kamala can do in the White House. The work of bearing and loving children is powerful, although not in the way the world understands it.
Kudos to Kamala for her amazing accomplishment. And, kudos just as much to all of the amazing women who are also doing the real work of building a nation. To all the moms, wives, and ordinary people–you don’t have to have great power to prove your worth. You’re worthy because God said you are– not because of what you have accomplished on the national stage. When we can look at the “low” work that women have traditionally done and appreciate it just as much as the accomplishments of those who are in high places, maybe then we will have achieved something even greater than a vice-presidency.
I have been toying with the idea of deleting my Facebook account. This is a pretty big deal for me as I often utilize social media to organize events and groups and to share stories with friends and family (and to aimlessly scroll through way too much drama, like everyone else in the world.)
Today, I listened to The World and Everything in It (this sounds like a soap opera, but it’s not), where Katie Gaultney described her “social media fast” and the results of it. I found her experience to be predictable (she felt more focused, relaxed, and present with her children,) but there were a couple of things I would have liked to discuss further with her. In particular, she described a conversation with a friend, who claimed that stories on social media were “narcissistic in nature” and that it was maybe better not to feed into that kind of a mindset. I sort of agreed with this idea at first, but then I thought– if sharing your story is narcissistic– then why is Katie Gaultney sharing her story here about her social media fast? Wouldn’t that be sort of… narcissistic?
So is it okay to share our stories on social media… or not? I think platforms like Facebook are a little tricky to navigate well. They tend to favor shorter, more shallow posts and the ones that garner the most attention are often controversial and attempt to stir the pot. But, for me, they sometimes fill a deeper need– the need to hear– or even tell– a story.
Two of my favorite past-times growing up were reading books and listening to music– country music, in particular. (I mean– if you play it backward– you’ll get your dog back, your wife back, your car back– what’s not to love?) I have probably spent years of my life attempting to experience the world through other people’s eyes. I find it to be fascinating when I get a glimpse of how people think and what they see. I like a good story.
I picked up a book tonight, and reading it kind of brought all of these thoughts together. In Romancing Your Child’s Heart, Monte Swan declares that “God’s primary way of communicating His character, His love, and His will has always been through stories– the only vehicle capable of carrying a significant cargo of truth to the human heart as He Himself designed it.” I think he’s right. Do you want to know why people are so addicted to social media? We are craving good stories because we are craving an even Bigger Story. The Gospel is the greatest story ever told. It’s about undeserved love, self-sacrifice, rooting for the underdog, tragedy, and ultimately, the triumph of good over evil.
I don’t know how to make social media better. Facebook or not, people will be out there telling their stories, and unless they have an idea of a True Story overarching their own, the stories may get a little rough. I wonder if, as we participate in the stories around us, we can keep our focus on telling a Good Story, whatever that may look like in our lives? Let’s believe that in the end, good will overcome evil, giants will be slain, and tragedy will be made into beauty. We are all part of the greatest story ever told. If we can remember that, we can write some truly beautiful stories together, on or off of social media.
We made it to the halfway point in our homeschooling year! I can’t help but hum along to the chorus of the Bon Jovi song: “Whoa, we’re halfway there. Whoa, livin’ on a prayer.” Picture me humming this song as I stop the toddler from crawling on top of the computer desk again, as my girls fight about who gets to read Winter at Valley Forge first (I mean, because why not start a war right in the house?) and my little boys hit one another with plastic swords.
“Yeah! We’ve gotta hold on to what we’ve got. It doesn’t make a difference if we make it or not. We’ve got each other and that’s a lot. For love we’ll give it a shot.” I’m not sure that homeschooling was what Bon Jovi was talking about in his song, but– maybe?
We have finished 18 out of 36 weeks of our homeschool curriculum, and I thought I’d give an update as to what has gone well, what has been challenging, what we have learned, and what my thoughts of homeschooling are after five months.
So, here goes.
This year, my kids are in grades one, three, and five. My little ones are two and four years old. I have taught school before, and I have been a mom for eleven years, so I am seasoned (I will not say old.) I have to say that, overall, for me, it is more fun to teach my own kids than to teach in a public school setting. I know my kids really well, so I know what they like and how they learn. Picking our curriculum was a lot of fun for me, as is teaching in a more “holistic” way than you can in the classroom. I do follow a pretty structured curriculum (Sonlight,) but we can listen to songs while we eat breakfast, read in the morning at the table (or in the car on the way to get groceries) and read out loud as a family at night. I personally enjoy learning, and my kids stay engaged in what we are learning (most of the time.) They have told me that they like homeschooling better than public school because they can learn at their pace and they don’t have to go over the same materials so many times. (They like it less than public school because they miss their teachers and their friends.) I think that the kids are getting a good education, although it is a little hard to know, as I am obviously not seeing the long-term results of this little experiment, so this is my best guess. My kids will take the PSSA’s this year, so I should see how their test scores compare to other years. I’m not honestly sure how much I care about those scores, but I think that it could be easy in homeschooling to think that you are doing more than you are. So, I’m thinking that standardized testing might be a nice reality check.
As I intimated in the last paragraph, learning in a homeschool setting has been a fun way for the kids to learn. They are generally motivated and learning is more “natural” than in a public school setting. I think they will walk away from this year with a genuine love of learning. However, I think it is sometimes difficult to challenge them to move out of their comfort zones when learning isn’t fun. When kids go to school, they have teachers that they want to please, other kids that they want to compete with, tests that they want to ace. In homeschool, the kids have to be very self-motivated to learn, because there is no smiling teacher standing in front of them: there’s only ol’ mom, and sometimes, the kids don’t want to do what mom asks them to do. (Dad is a great back-up to have as a principal for misbehaving students, I am finding.) I guarantee that my children have given me a much harder time over many of their lessons than they ever did in the public school, unless all of their teachers lied to me on their previous report cards. Sometimes, my kids are not “a delight to have in class,” if I am being honest! We have our fair share of tears over decimals, mental math, and having to write reports. We have many good days, but they certainly aren’t always easy.
As for what we have learned this year. My kids have read a lot of books, and they have learned more history this year than they have in all of their other years of school. I appreciate the approach to American History (Sonlight Core D) and the books it uses to teach about the values that started America. I honestly wish this content would/ could be taught in our public schools. We also are reading through the Bible, with a passage from the Old and New Testament each day. The kids also listen to a Scripture CD, which helps them to memorize Bible verses. Even Andy, at two, can sing along with some of the verses. It is hilarious to me when he asks me to sing “Iron Sharpens Iron” to go to sleep. We are using Singapore Math this year, and I am pretty sure that is close to the Common Core math that the kids learn at school. There are some things I don’t love about this math (the book’s setup, in particular,) but I do like the order that it presents the concepts, and the pacing seems to be reasonable. At times, I supplement our fifth grader’s math with videos from Khan Academy or lessons from Dad at night, which I hope are filling in any gaps that I am leaving. For science we are following Science Apologia, and I really only have good things to say about it. It is an immersion method of science, so all year long, we are learning about botany (which the kids picked, not me.) I enjoy the Christian perspective it brings to science, although I am starting to get tired of plants! The kids seem to be holding up pretty well, however. *Note– for first grade science, I am just having my seven year old learn about an animal a day and write one fact that he learns. I have found that this seems to be enough for his age. For language arts, we are reading a ton, writing “mini-reports,” and learning very functional grammar. I probably could be doing more in this area, but my perspective for kids learning English is just to get them to read and write as much as possible. (I may know how to use grammar most of the time, but please don’t ask me what a hanging participle is!) We have also added some extras that I have been able to outsource, including art, piano, and dance. Thank you to all of the teachers (and baby-sitters) that give this mama a break! Our “extras” definitely make our homeschooling experience better.
Without the pandemic, we wouldn’t have chosen to homeschool our kids, and I’m not sure if we will homeschool again after this school year, but I know it is a viable option for our family. I’m grateful that I have had this opportunity. We’re learning a lot together, we’re growing, we’re doing it. And for now, that calls for a celebration!
“Whoa! Halfway there! Take my hand, and we’ll make it, I swear. Whoa! Livin’ on a Prayer!”
The first church I attended as a child was a small red brick United Methodist church. I attended this church until I was ten years old, and, although I was young when I went, I still have memories from my time in this church. I remember sitting in the back chairs with my squirmy little sisters, waiting to go to the dreaded nursery, since I was shy and didn’t want to go downstairs without my mom and dad. I remember my choir teacher, telling us to “throw” our voices forward so people could hear us and the one time I watched in fascination as a tiny green inchworm crawled on top of her very black hair. (I stayed quiet, because the one thing we were not supposed to do during choir practice was to talk.) I remember wearing matching taffeta dresses that my mom made for my sisters and me, and I remember the little attendance pin I received after going to Vacation Bible School. I can still sing a few songs from that era, including the hopping “Bright Bouncing Love Ball,” as well as the little ditty that goes like this:
The church is not a building. The church is not a steeple. The church is not a resting place. The church is the people. I am the church, you are the church, we are the church together. All will follow Jesus, all around the world. Yes, we’re the church together.
*You can find this song here. Don’t forget to do the hand motions while you sing it!
When we moved to a new home when I turned eleven, I had to leave my old church behind, but I confess that it didn’t seem like that big of a deal to me. Church was like school– something you had to go to because it was the right thing to do. Our new church was even smaller than our first church, and we were some of the very few children that attended. In this church, we sang hymns that I will always remember: “The Old Rugged Cross,” “In the Garden,” “What a Friend We Have in Jesus” and many more. The singing was the best part. In this church, we had a variety of pastors who did everything from dress up as Mary to calling us forward for “Children’s Time.” Of course, as an eleven year old, I was definitely over “Children’s Time” and did not really want to be included with the little kids anymore. And so, sometimes, church became a fight between me and my mom as I would rather stay home and watch t.v. or clean the house or listen to the American Country Countdown. (Don’t judge, please.) But because my parents made me (most of the time,) I kept showing up. Another great part about this church was the attention the adults gave us kids. They asked about us, what we liked, how we were doing, and clearly cared for us. I felt loved by the adults here. I confess that I don’t remember too many sermons I heard, but I learned the basic tenets of the faith: I recited the Nicene Creed, participated in communal prayer, and went all the way through confirmation.
As I grew older and went through all of the pivotal moments that come into the life of a tween girl, I deepened in my faith and wanted more– especially more fellowship with kids my own age. I started attending youth group at another church, which seemed way cooler than Children’s Time, and I eventually branched out in my teen years and started going to church on my own (okay, with my boyfriend.) This church impacted me in a different way. This church felt more real to me, like the people here were not going to leave church in the church building, but take it home with them at night. Perhaps because I was a young adult now, I saw how the church had things to say about real life situations and problems– I saw how people would encourage one another after the death of a loved one, or how it gave important advice in regards to relationships, and how the people struggled through their own conflicts, while meeting together week after week. This was the church where I was baptized as an adult and where I first understood that church was about more than doing the right thing. And, this is the church I still call home.
Now, Covid-19 has brought us to a new era in our church and in my church experience. It has been a bit of a push and pull as we have sorted out how to “do church” in a pandemic. We have hosted drive-in services, socially-distanced services, home-church services, and online services. Currently, we are back “in-person,” meeting together, although there are people who are no longer able to meet in person due to health concerns.
All of those things have been great and necessary for the time being, but I do hope that people don’t get the wrong idea about what church is. Because, while the church is not limited to a building, church isall about meeting together with a group of believers. It is all about people getting to know one another, week after week, while professing their commitment to Christ. Church can be in a small group in a home, or in a very large building, but we can’t give up meeting together if we are Christians. Meeting together is “essential” to our faith, although many in the secular world might not understand what the big deal is. We are much, much more than a social club if we are truly being the church. We are Christ’s body, and “church” is how He chose to help us grow.
I am praying for those who cannot come to church right now. I know it’s hard. I’m looking forward to when more people can come together to worship God and when we can see those we have been missing over the past year. I’m also encouraging those who are not attending church– to not forget that the meeting together is what is important. It is not always comfortable, but it’s God’s idea of getting us to grow in our faith. I am the church. You are the church. We are the church. Together.
I am struggling with big feelings again. To put it simply: I am angry. I am not usually an angry person, but I am pretty fired up. Specifically, I am fired up about the way that our government, in particular, the governor of the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, is handling the pandemic. Instead of appealing to people’s best motives and intentions and believing that people want to do what is right, and instead of working with people, our governor has decided that the best way to deal with the pandemic is using a top-down approach, where he will decide what is best for everyone else.
I am fortunate. My husband has a job, and I have the ability to provide an education for my kids. Others are not so fortunate, and the ramifications for society will be long-lasting, I’m afraid. And so, I’m angry. I don’t think that this viewpoint is bad, but a valid viewpoint considering our current circumstances.
However, there is, I think, a danger in getting too caught up with the state of the world. If I focus too much on these feelings and ideas that I have, I might lose some essential parts of myself and of my life. There’s a quotation from Ben Franklin that I have been pondering this week that applies to our current situation: “Instead of cursing the darkness, light a candle.”
Even during a pandemic, during times of sickness and dying, even when our government fails, even when the future looks uncertain, I can still shine a light. I can still smile and laugh with my kids. I can do a good job at homeschooling them. I can be a good wife and partner to my husband. I can be cheerful and thankful. I can celebrate the holidays with my family. I can go to church and sing and worship with my church family (albeit, in a different way than normal.) I can keep things in perspective. I can forgive. I can shop local. I can give to those who are in need. I may need to limit whom I visit and how I do things, but I don’t really have to focus on what I can’t do all day long. I can still live and live whole-heartedly and joyfully.
One of my heroes, C.S. Lewis, wrote an essay to encourage his fellow citizens during the atomic age. The world he and his peers lived in was a scary world. It was a world of war and a world of the atomic bomb. It was a world of uncertainty. But Lewis’s words had a way of encouraging his listeners, as they do today. Here is an excerpt from his essay “On Living in an Atomic Age:”
In one way we think a great deal too much of the atomic bomb. “How are we to live in an atomic age?” I am tempted to reply: “Why, as you would have lived in the sixteenth century when the plague visited London almost every year, or as you would have lived in a Viking age when raiders from Scandinavia might land and cut your throat any night; or indeed, as you are already living in an age of cancer, an age of syphilis, an age of paralysis, an age of air raids, an age of railway accidents, an age of motor accidents.”
In other words, do not let us begin by exaggerating the novelty of our situation. Believe me, dear sir or madam, you and all whom you love were already sentenced to death before the atomic bomb was invented: and quite a high percentage of us were going to die in unpleasant ways. We had, indeed, one very great advantage over our ancestors — anesthetics; but we have that still. It is perfectly ridiculous to go about whimpering and drawing long faces because the scientists have added one more chance of painful and premature death to a world which already bristled with such chances and in which death itself was not a chance at all, but a certainty.
This is the first point to be made: and the first action to be taken is to pull ourselves together. If we are all going to be destroyed by an atomic bomb, let that bomb when it comes find us doing sensible and human things praying, working, teaching, reading, listening to music, bathing the children, playing tennis, chatting to our friends over a pint and a game of darts—not huddled together like frightened sheep and thinking about bombs. They may break our bodies (a microbe can do that) but they need not dominate our minds.
This is not the worst time in history, by any means. We need to keep living and not get too caught up in the circumstances all around us. We don’t need to be obsessing over whether we will get covid or not. We don’t need to be obsessing and fuming over what the governor will do next. Each day is uncertain, and each day is a gift, pandemic or not. Let’s not waste our time staring at the darkness. Let’s shine a light. Merry Christmas!
When I was in the 5th grade, one of my favorite teachers completed an experiment with our class. One student was sent out of the room on an “errand,” and the rest of the class was let in on the secret. The teacher held up an orange colored paper for everyone in the class to see. “When the student comes in,” he told us, “I am going to ask each of you to tell me what color this paper is. You all are to say ‘pink.’ When this student came back into the room, our teacher held up the paper for everyone to see and proceeded to ask the class– one by one– what color the paper was. Each and every one said that the orange paper was pink. When he got to the student who was not in on the little game, we all waited to see what she would do. She looked flustered, but proceeded to hesitantly say “pink.” Such was the power of the crowd.
This little lesson is social behavior has stuck with me all the way up until my 35th year. At the time, I wondered– “If I were the student who entered the room– would I have spoken up for truth?” And honestly, I’m not sure. I’d like to think I would, but, especially when you are in the 5th grade, it is hard to see things differently than the people around you do.
In some ways, as an adult, it is easier to speak up for what is true than it was as a kid. (I mean, wasn’t middle school about the worst time ever?) I think experiencing life for yourself makes it easier to know what is true and to not be afraid to stand out a bit from the crowd. In that way, speaking truth is easier; however, in other ways, it has become more difficult. One reason that it is harder than ever to decide what is “true” is that we are now living in a “post-truth” world. This basically means that we no longer have a common sense, as a people, of what is true. In the past, in America, our understanding of what is true was mostly based on a common belief in God and the Bible. We call this a Judeo-Christian worldview, meaning the worldview primarily developed from the Jewish and Christian ways of seeing the world (along with various other influences, including Greek.) However, we have come to the point in our history as a nation that we simply don’t see the world the way we used to. Faith in God has been largely thrown out, as people seek to create their own “truth.”
Some may think that this is progress, but living in a post-truth world has (several) obvious downsides. When worldviews are no longer based on a common consensus (the Bible, in this case,) truth becomes extremely subjective. So subjective, in fact, that “truth” is defined by each and every person for himself. We are now told to “live your truth” by the spiritually aware. In a well-meaning, wishy-washy article from The Huff Post, the author tells her readers: “Now that you know your truths, live it loudly and proudly. Let no one deny you your truth. Be honest and full in your truth. Don’t hide behind judgment, self or society inflicted, or anything else. Your personal truth is just that, truth. Haven’t we been told to always tell the truth. So do it loudly and proudly. ” (Excuse me while I roll my eyes.)
In a world without a basic understanding of reality, this is where we are at. We get to define truth for ourselves and nobody gets to define it for us. So, when the teacher holds up the orange colored paper in the post-truth era, he would no longer be able to tell his students that the paper was orange to begin with. Instead, he could probably ask each one what color he perceived it to be, and no student could possibly get it wrong.
It is interesting to see where this mindset has led us, but it is not comforting to me. Because I still see obvious truths in the world, I may have a difficult time navigating the “post-truth” era. It seems that in this new society, one of the worst things you can do is to point out that there is a real truth underlying the world. Because I have a different worldview, I may step on some toes and hurt someone’s perceived truth. I may experience discrimination and hostility because I am going to live my truth, but insist that it is an actual truth that exists apart from me.
Recently, these dynamics played out in real time in a neighboring (rural) community. In a board meeting, a board member spoke out about the LGBTQ display in the library, saying that he did not think it belonged in the public school setting. Of course, this was on a video, so many people saw this and jumped on this man’s statement. In fact, it ended up being reported on the evening news. It is possible that he did not say this in the most politically correct manner ever, and, predictably, he was immediately censured for what he said. In fact, people in the community started a petition for his removal from the school board (an elected position) because of his view. Not only that, but his school officials suggested that he should take “sensitivity training” so that he could learn how to view the LGBTQ community. (Welcome to 1984.)
Now, as a Christian, I don’t think LGBTQ issues are the heart of the Gospel message, not at all. There are basic truths about sexuality that are clearly presented in the Bible, however, and you can come to your own conclusion about them. What troubles me most about the post-truth world is that there is no room for dissenting voices in this kind of environment. When I was growing up, “tolerance” was the buzz word. We were all supposed to be “tolerant” of people with different views, and we assumed that everyone would be “tolerant” of our own.
However, that has not been the case. In a post-truth world, “truth” is more likely to be defined by who is in power, not by any other objective standard. Even science has often been beaten into submission by those in power, with those whose views don’t line up with the main stream narrative publicly censured, denied jobs, and pushed to the side of academia. Historically, this kind of power play happens over and over. It is a dangerous environment. We are in danger of believing everything and nothing, and it may be a difficult world to face for those who see “truth” differently than those in power do.
I’ll end with some questions for those who are reading: is there truly room for diversity in a post-truth world? Do you know what you believe, and are you willing to stand up and speak it, even if you suffer for it? And, are we really going to create a world where we must pretend that we all see the same color?
Pandemic life is kind of intense. And, it just keeps going. The highs are high, and the lows are low as people adjust to a lot of changes in a relatively short period of time. Navigating life is just a bit more complex than it was in 2019.
Relationships fall into the category of “complex” during the best of times, so making our way through the pandemic with our relationships intact may be the most challenging obstacle we face in 2020 and beyond. The way people have chosen to respond to the pandemic is as diverse as people are themselves. We’ve got a spectrum of responses, all the way from “throw caution to the wind” to “hunker down.”
Depending on what side of the issues you are on, it is tempting to judge others and to develop strong (negative) feelings about them. It would be too easy for someone who is trying to be responsible to dismiss people that they see not taking precautions as “selfish” or possibly “stupid.” On the other hand, it would be just as easy for the “live a little” crowd to view those who are handling things differently as “self-centered” and “scared.”
The thing is that Satan would love for us to be divided because of a bad situation. His main job is to “steal, kill and, destroy,” especially our relationships, because our relationships with God and with others are God’s primary priority.
From Matthew 22: “Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’[a]38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[b]40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.””
All the Law and the Prophets hang on how we treat one another.
Sometimes, I struggle with loving others. I get angry at them, or hurt, or start to judge them. I can easily see that “they” are the problem. When it comes down to it, though, I am a sinful person. I sin in a variety of ways that I can’t even see. I have been a stinker to God many times in my life, and He has every right to be angry with me or to dismiss me from His life. He isn’t he one who has done anything wrong. And yet, He loves me.
Somehow, He is able to see beyond what I do and even who I am to love me. Just because I have put my faith in Christ, it’s like God is no longer able to see my sin, because all He does or sees when He looks at me is the love that Christ had for me (all people) on the cross. This is grace.
During difficult seasons, it is much easier to magnify the difficulty than to magnify God. (At least, that’s the most natural response.) But, if we can make this a season of grace, we will magnify God, even through the difficulty. I’ll end with a passage from Colossians 3 that seems fitting and encouraging:
12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
I’m praying that we, the Church, can put on love today. Let’s make the Covid-19 era, above all else, a time of grace.
I don’t know about you, but my stomach kind of hurts right now. It feels like, nationally speaking, we are on a roller coaster ride with a bunch of very different people. There are some who love the chaos and the speed of the coaster, some who are screaming for it to go faster, and others who just want the dumb thing to stop. I’m in the latter category. Can we get off this coaster sometime soon, please?
But, for now, we’re stuck. Now, I have strong opinions about this whole Covid-election thing and how it’s going down, but I have to admit that I don’t have any inside knowledge of political intrigue. I mean, I could have told people that now would not be the best time to change the voting process, but for some reason, no one asked me. So, here we are, and it’s the ugly mess we all thought it would be.
During this time of confusion, I find it very helpful to go back to the truths I know that can help to anchor my soul, and that is the Word of God. From Hebrews, Chapter #6:
17 “So when God wanted to make the unchanging nature of His purpose very clear to the heirs of the promise, He guaranteed it with an oath. 18Thus by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled to take hold of the hope set before us may be strongly encouraged.
19We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, 20where Jesus our forerunner has entered on our behalf. He has become a high priest forever in the order of Melchizedek.”
When you don’t know what to believe, what do you do? Do you turn to your neighbor or turn on the news? Do you research conspiracy theories on facebook? Do you search deep within and try to “find yourself?” When everything is said and done and you need something to cling to, how about clinging to an unchanging Word to anchor your soul?
I have a favorite book that has helped me during times of confusion and the words from it keep coming to mind. In Believing God, Beth Moore sums up five truths we can cling to: I’ll share them here:
Lovely words, aren’t they? God is in control, even when life seems a bit out of control. Hold on tight!
Once upon a time, we used to read each other’s emotions based on facial expressions and cues, but for now, at least, this is a little more difficult to do. However, face masks and the many different versions of mask wearing gives us some insights into the way people are thinking and feeling. It’s kind of a fun game to play. Can you guess… what’s going on “Behind the Mask?”
I don’t know if I have all of these right, but here are some things I have seen and surmised during this pandemic about masks and the different types of personalities they represent.
Surgical Masks: Those who wear surgical-type masks seem to be a very serious people. They are mask-wearing to prevent disease, period. These mask-wearers are not so concerned about fashion, but believe in a utilitarian approach to disease. If anyone is going to get out of this pandemic without getting sick, it is a surgical masker. Want to stay safe during a pandemic? Befriend these guys. They are your best bet.
Homemade Masks: Homemade maskers sport various colors and patterns on their faces. These types are often crafty and enjoy wearing masks that fit their mood and personality. Homemade maskers will often have masks that are personalized to their tastes: golden retrievers, hot air balloons, cats. Stylish, yet down-home, homemade maskers emit an aura of responsibility, with a bit of a crunchy vibe.
Sports Masks: These maskers proudly wear their favorite team’s colors and stripes. They support their favorite team while staying safe. Sports team maskers have an immediate conversation starter on their face. Don’t know what to say to someone you meet for the first time? Check out their mask, and get ready to talk about the Yankees. Go team!
The Black Masks: Of all the masks out there, the black mask styles look to be the best-fitting and the most comfortable. These maskers are good shoppers. They know where to get nice things in nice materials, and they look good doing it. These folks are a bit of a mystery to me, as I still don’t know where they find their special black masks, but kudos to them for getting the job done right!
Gaiter-heads: Mostly worn by men, gaiters should probably be in a special category of their own. My personal favorite, gaiters are worn down around the neck and can be pulled up in a case where social distancing is not possible. Extremely comfortable (and thin,) it is doubtful that gaiters do much at all, but they do provide at least a semblance of conformity. Gaiters are for the pragmatist– those looking to be comfortable, but still able to function in society without undue criticism from others.
Message Masks: These maskers basically have the opportunity to put a tattoo on their face. These masks can portray political commentary, emoji faces, or personalized messages. Message maskers are ready to put themselves out there and are sure to be the life of any party.
Under the Nose-Masks: Those who wear their masks under their noses believe in the idea of putting a mask on their face, but are unable to deal with the feeling that they cannot breathe while wearing one. They compromise those two feelings by pulling the mask down, under their nose, giving off the idea that they care, while still being true to themselves.
Non-maskers: Non-maskers are the most interesting case among us now, in my opinion. Both the objects of ridicule and praise, non-maskers immediately send a strong message to others. Now, whether that message is that they simply don’t care about people or that they think personal freedom is more important than conformity is up to the interpreter, but there is clearly a message to be read on their “naked” faces. Bonus: you might actually be able to read their lips or seem them (occasionally) smile!
So, there’s my roundup of the most common types of masks and what might be going on “behind the mask.” Have I missed any types? Which masking personality are you?
I went to a good high school. Despite being located in the middle of nowhere, and despite the fact that we only graduated 70 in my class, I learned what I needed to know to do well on my SAT’s and to perform well in college. I also went to an excellent college, which I will shamelessly plug for right now (Indiana Wesleyan University, Marion IN) where I attended interesting classes and met wonderful professors and students. I can say that for me, it was worth the cost of tuition, and I don’t think that you can honestly say that about too many colleges in the United States.
That said– I didn’t receive my very best education either at high school or college. My best education came from the farm. When I was 11 years old, I started “farming” with my Uncle Bill on our 50 cow dairy farm. My chores consisted of taking care of the baby calves and young heifers, which sounds easy enough on paper, but was actually very challenging, especially given the low-tech nature of our set-up.
My primary job was to keep the calves clean. My tools were a shovel and wheelbarrow and a good deal of enthusiasm. I would scrape the young heifers’ stalls down twice a day and, scoop by scoop, I would haul the manure out of the heifer barn and into the dairy barn where it would be whisked away by our “drop,” to be spread in our manure spreader on our fields. I would then grab my trusty wheelbarrow and head out to our sawdust pile, where I would fill up my wheelbarrow, wheel it into the heifer barn and then spread the sawdust out under each animal’s bed.
I was so proud of myself when I got those beds to look so good– until, of course, two minutes later, when a heifer would inevitably eject a large plop of manure right onto my sawdust masterpiece. It was a disappointment that I got used to, as this scenario was repeated day after day. Despite my hard work, it would look like I was not making any progress. Of course, I learned better. (You should have seen those calves when I left their stalls alone for a couple of days!)
My other job was to feed the baby calves their bottles and pails of milk. We used waste milk on our farm to feed the calves, which meant that we used the milk from the cows that was not able to go into the bulk tank– mostly, milk from fresh cows (cows that had just had a calf.) Again, very little was automated on our farm, so I became the chief pail carrier, lugging a five gallon bucket of milk to the calves from the milk-house and apportioning it out to the babies. I loved my babies. I did my best to feed them and keep them healthy, and I loved to see them grow.
Sometimes, though, my precious babies got sick and died. I remember one little bull calf I called PeeWee. PeeWee was not worth much at all, as bull calves were bringing maybe $40 at the time. Poor PeeWee was born with birth defects. I remember feeding him and taking care of him and even praying for him, but he was never going to make it. Uncle Bill let me try and felt bad for me when I cried, but that was also a lesson I learned on the farm. You can do everything right, and sometimes bad things will happen, because that is life. There were other instances when we probably could have called the vet earlier (said from a veterinarian wife’s perspective,) but in so many cases, I learned that death is just an inevitable part of life.
Sometimes, during farming, I got frustrated that things never went quite the way that I thought they should. Water bowls broke, my heifers kicked me, we ran out of sawdust, and my favorite calf unexpectedly got scours. Undoubtedly, there were things we could have done better– maybe by employing better practices in weaning calves or by developing a feeding protocol. But, I learned a lot along the way– I learned that hard work makes a difference, that life isn’t always fair, and that nothing in life is perfect.
If I were to do one thing to improve our education system in this country, it would be to give kids a shovel and a wheelbarrow and tell them to get busy. You can learn a lot of great things in a classroom, but there are some things that you can only learn on a farm.
I don’t think that some people consider running to be a sport. I get it. It seems too simple overall. I mean– you basically put on a pair of shoes and run. Kids do it all the time. Adults do it when they are being chased by wild animals. It’s actually not rocket science. But, out of all of the sports I’ve played and watched, running is still my favorite.
Need a little motivation to get started? Here are my top five reasons to lace up your running shoes.
Running…burns calories like nothing else. I have a healthy appetite. I enjoy food. Want to know the exercise that burns the most calories per time invested? Yep. Running is right up there at the top. I went on a 12 mile run today and burned approximately 1200 calories. Trust me. I enjoyed my sausage, eggs, and pancakes this morning.
Running… restores your sense of adventure. Running outdoors in rural northeastern PA is an adventure, especially if you run on roads that are new to you. You’ve got fabulous hills to run up and down, awesome views, and inevitable (and exciting) encounters with animals of all sorts. (I was chased by two goats last week.) If you like an adventure, ditch the treadmill and get outside!
Running… gives you a chance to bond with friends. If you want to start running but lack the motivation, you have to find friends to do it with you. Sometimes, the only thing that gets you out of bed on a weekend morning is knowing that there are people who are waiting for you to run with them. If you go on a grueling run with your friends, you will build some serious rapport as you chat about how much running up the hill hurts or maybe what is really going on in your life.
Running… costs next to nothing. Running as a sport is as cheap as it gets. I do recommend getting a nice pair of shoes, which you can usually buy for about $50- $100, depending what brand you like and if you watch for sales. (I usually buy one pair a year for about $60 and then retire my running shoes into “regular” shoes.) Other than that, you need some basic running clothing, and that’s it!
Running…gives you some great stories. You know how fishermen have stories about the fabulous fish they caught that one time on that particular river? Running pretty much gives you the same deal. Of course, instead of reminiscing about smelly fish, you’ll be talking about the times you ran on this course or how it poured the whole time during that run, or how you saw a black bear on this road, or how you got chased by a dog on that road. (It all makes some great conversation, I promise.)
Anyone can be a runner. I know runners of all shapes and sizes. Truly, the hardest part is lacing up your shoes to go out the door. But once you’re out there? It’s really a great sport. The hardest step is the one out the door. After that, it’s all downhill (or at least that’s what we tell ourselves.) Happy running!
This post is inspired by a provocative question I saw on social media that asked: WHY IS ANYONE IN HIS RIGHT MIND VOTING FOR DONALD TRUMP IN 2020? For many people, this is a difficult question to understand. Attempts to answer it often lead people to bemoan how stupid the general populace is, or perhaps how bigoted and hate-filled people are, or perhaps how powerful the Trump campaign is. Unfortunately, these answers do not fully answer a complicated question. The other day, I was out at our around-the-town yard sales, and I saw the sweetest couple I have ever known sporting MAGA hats proudly. I know these people well, and I know that they are the salt of the earth. So, what’s going on underneath those bright red hats?
I’m going to do my best to spell it out for those who have a hard time understanding. So, here goes– five reasons why half of Americans are on the Trump train.
Mainstream Media Bias
I have to give the mainstream media a lot of credit for causing people to support Donald Trump. Of course, they are not deliberately supporting the Donald. Instead, their unvarying censure of Donald Trump has only endeared him more to his followers, while bringing along those who are tired of the same dance and song. The media in the U.S. is dominated by liberal thoughts and ideas, and according to many sources, has been for a very long time. Here’s an interesting NBC op-ed piece from 2018 that explains it better than I can. Basically, the mainstream media has gone so far in promoting one agenda that many, many American simply do not believe anything that is written on CNN, ABC, NBC, or CNN (Wait– did I say CNN twice?) So, if the President faces a new scandal, according to the news– half of the country simply doesn’t listen. Until the media is able to see things from multiple perspectives, they will lose major credibility with people who do not fall in line with their ideologies.
2. Push-back to Political Correctness
Political Correctness. Newspeak. Double-think. However, you frame it, being “PC” is where it’s at, according to liberals. The stated goal of political correctness, according to the “Collins Dictionary,” is the attitude or policy of being extremelycareful not to offend or upset any group of people in society who have a disadvantage, or who have been treated differently because of their sex, race, or disability.”
What seems to be a noble goal, to many, also seems to challenge free thought for others as those in charge define what language is acceptable and what is not acceptable and therefore, what values are acceptable and not acceptable. An NPR poll states that 52% of Americans were against the country becoming more politically correct in 2018. For many, the demand for political correctness has less to do with helping people to be kinder and more to do with manipulating them to believe certain things. In this case, Score #2 for Donald Trump, who refreshingly “says it like it is” and gains hero status for those who are dreaming of challenging the PC pundits.
3. The Abortion Issue
For many people, abortion is the issue that they are voting on. While many on the left see limiting abortion as a trampling on women’s rights, those who are pro-life are seeing a different argument. For those who are pro-life, there is little difference between a baby in the womb or a baby out of the womb. Consider this– in the last 30 years or so, advances in medicine and science have enabled people to come home from a regular doctor’s appointment with an extremely clear picture of their baby. They see the fingers, they count the toes, and they name their babies before they are born. Similarly, doctors are now able to operate on babies in the womb. Babies born prematurely are also more able to survive than ever with the help of modern medicine– the smallest surviving “micro-preemie” surviving at 23 weeks of gestational age and just 8.6 ounces. The reasoning is not that difficult to see here. Why could one baby be aborted at 23 weeks of age, while another baby in the exact same condition would receive medical care? For many, this is the defining issue.
4. American Nationalism
For many years, people in our country have seen themselves as exceptional. We have seen ourselves as a symbol of democracy and light in the world. Like it or not, that has been our narrative. We have been taught to respect our history, to sing the national anthem, and to venerate veterans and those in authority. Undoubtedly, there is good mixed up with bad in the idea of American exceptionalism, but it is a narrative that we have held for a long while. For many, the new narrative that is coming out of the Democratic party seems to be anti-American at its core. While the left may bring up many legitimate issues, to many, they just come across as anti-American.
5. Fear of Communism/ Socialism
The last fundamental issue I’ll touch on is the idea of government control. If the Covid-19 pandemic has brought any issue into more contrast, I’m not sure what it is. The Covid-19 pandemic is forcing people to take a very strong look at what they believe the role of government should be. Obviously, many people feel safer when the government is mandating how citizens should act during times of emergencies. Many people would love to see a national “mask mandate” for instance, and are upset that the federal government did not put something like that into place from the beginning. But– many, many people– believe that a democratic nation does not have the right to dictate the personal choices that people make (no matter if that advice is backed up by science or not.) For these people, the government itself is the real threat, with the potential to terrorize people as much as the coronavirus ever could.
So, there you have it: five reasons why (actual!) people are voting for Donald Trump in 2020!
I am going to let you in on a little secret. I have found an amazing way to lose weight fast. I’m calling it NORO-20, short for norovirus-2020. Now, why this has not turned into a commercial enterprise by now, I cannot say. All that I know, is that by ingesting a little NORO-20 you will be well on your way to your weight loss goals.
Guys– this one is soooo easy. You don’t have to work out, it decreases your appetite for at least three days, and it cleanses your system like nothing else. If you need a fresh start and a reboot for your digestive system, let me tell you now– THIS IS IT.
The amazing thing is– it is completely free. That’s right, folks. You can take NORO-20 home for $0. All you have to do is come to my house and watch my children, and maybe find a tiny spot in our house that I have yet to touch with a cleaning solution (plenty spots left!) and you too can take home NORO-20 and watch those last stubborn pounds fade away!
But– act fast. These little germs (ahem, gems) can only last so long! Time is a-wasting! I have spots open for house-cleaning and childcare NOW, in my home. Please contact me to get a hold of this once-in-a-season deal. You have nothing to lose, except some stubborn weight (and approximately three days of your life!) Dial NORO-20 now for more information!
I was recently attracted by a quotation on social media that someone attributed to C.S. Lewis, one of my favorite authors. The quotation (supposed to be from the Screwtape Letters) is as follows:
My dear wormwood, Be sure the patient remains completely fixated on politics. Arguments, political gossip, and obsessing on the faults of people they have never met serves as an excellent distraction from advancing in personal virtue, character, and the things the patient can control.
I thought this quotation was interesting and it gave me a moment of pause. A little research, however, brought me to the conclusion that this quotation was actually NOT written by C.S. Lewis. So, of course, I had to spend a little time researching what Lewis’s real take on politics was, especially given our present circumstances in the U.S.A.
I found an interesting article on Lewis and politics (here,) which gave me some food for thought. To summarize, the article suggests that Lewis felt a sort of tension about politics. The article points out that on one hand, Lewis abhorred politics, writing in a letter, “Our papers at the moment are filled with nothing but politics, a subject in which I cannot take any interest.” However, later in the same letter, he criticized the Labour government in a “well-informed manner.”
The article goes on to say that Lewis was involved politically from a young age, writing letters and teaching– not specifically about politics– but about the “natural law” underpinning politics. I found this entire article to be fascinating, especially when examining Lewis’s thoughts about how a democratic country gets to totalitarianism– and I quote from the article– It could take the form of “a benevolent scientific bureaucracy, which destroys or damages mediating institutions such as the church and the family, and makes genuine freedom … difficult to achieve.” (I got some chills when reading this.) But, I digress.
C.S. Lewis did not like politics as such and did not want to become a political figure. But, from my understanding of his writings and from research about the man– he couldn’t help but speak out on political issues because politics, after all, are only an extension of our deeply held spiritual beliefs.
Here are some further quotations that explore Lewis’s thoughts on power and government:
From The Allegory of Love: “The descent to hell is easy, and those who begin by worshipping power soon worship evil.”
From God in the Dock: “Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victim may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron’s cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated, but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.”
And finally from God in the Dock: “He who converts his neighbour has performed the most practical Christian-political act of all.”
From my brief research, as well as from my prior readings of Lewis, here is my conclusion. A Christian’s end goal should never be political, but in our duty to speak the truth in love, we are going to undoubtedly run into politics.
I’m not sure exactly how this should look in the 2020 election, but I think we have to keep in mind the spiritual realities that are underneath “this present darkness.” As such, when I am tempted to yell at politicians I hear on the radio or t.v. (not that I would ever!) it may be better for me to remember that these are real people who are very often lost souls. It may be better for me to pray for our “leaders” than for me to get angry. It may be necessary for me to speak up, attend political rallies, and vote, but even if I do those things, I have to keep in mind that Politics Are Never Going to Solve Spiritual Problems.
The lack of a belief in God and the unwillingness to follow something other than our own inclinations are pulling our society apart. What this country needs more than anything is not for a certain party to win our election, but for a revival. If we are going to “Make America Great Again,” we need to examine our worldview and get back to the basics.
I’m going to close this off with another Lewis quote to consider: “If you read history you will find that the Christians who did most for the present world were precisely those who thought most of the next. It is since Christians have largely ceased to think of the other world that they have become so ineffective in this.” Let’s keep the end in mind!
This is my first year of homeschooling, due to our “unprecedented times.” We have completed four weeks of school since starting at the beginning of August when we eased into school, averaging about four days a week throughout the month. We’ve had some great times and some more trying times, but overall, it’s about what I expected, and I think we are going to have a really good year together.
The Good
Homeschooling has been mostly good, from my perspective at least. (You would have to ask my kids how they like their teacher, though, to get a full opinion.) I chose to go with the Sonlight Curriculum, which is based on a strong foundation of Bible, history, and literature. Doing Bible in the morning is a great discipline; we are currently reading Luke and Genesis and are memorizing Psalm 8. I love to see the kids growing in their knowledge of God’s Word! We are also using Core “D” this year and are reading books about the founding of America. This is a “good books” approach to learning. Instead of reading textbooks, the kids are reading books that are set in the early Colonial time period; some of these books are fiction and some are non-fiction. I appreciate that they are learning history in a natural way while they are improving their reading skills.
I also appreciate the structure that the curriculum provides. The curriculum comes with a teaching binder that outlines what the kids should read, how much to read, and what questions to answer. I basically open it up in the morning and we start school with zero prep work from me.
I was very blessed to have most of this material loaned to me by a fellow homeschool mom, so the cost for me was low. This program could definitely get expensive, but if you can afford it, I do recommend it, especially for families that enjoy reading. (If your child does not like reading or can’t read well, this might not be where I would start, but if your kids are readers, they will take off with Sonlight.)
Another highlight of homeschooling for me has been that our mornings are much less stressful, as I don’t have to attempt to get five children out the door by 7:30 in the morning. I also like the flexibility we have to add in some fun field trips and learning days with other kids. In addition, the kids have been enjoying looking up art projects on youtube, where they find much better art teachers than I am! They made Native American inspired drawings last week that impressed this art-challenged teacher.
We also love our science! We are learning from Science Apologia, which is am immersion type of science, meaning the kids learn deeply about a subject (Botany, for us) from a Biblical perspective. Science is probably our favorite subject, so we are doing this at the end of the day when the kids are about ready to check out of school. We are growing herbs to eventually put into homemade soap and are recording the progress of the plants, while we learn about the parts of a plant. At this point, we are set to add some more fun lessons to our schedule (piano and dance,) but are still finding our groove and trying not to start out with too much.
The Bad
I’m not going to say that there has been much “bad” in our first four weeks, but there are certainly some challenges to homeschooling. The biggest “challenge” for me as a teacher, is to deal with one unruly student (who happens to be two years old.) My four year old loves to be an extra student and is great for me during school time. My two year old likes my undivided attention and does not like when I am occupied elsewhere. I’m chalking this year up to a learning experience for him and an exercise in patience for me! Other challenges are that my kids are spending lots of time together (great,) but as they interact more and more together, they also tend to squabble more and more. If you have any magic for breaking up sibling fights, let me know! They are the best of friends and the worst of enemies. Balancing schooling, housework, shopping, and social life is certainly challenging, but I think it’s doable as long as I can keep realistic (i.e. low enough) expectations.
The Ugly
Of all of my curriculum, my least favorite is our Singapore math. I don’t exactly hate it, but I certainly don’t love it. I chose Singapore, because it more or less follows the Common Core math, which I do actually like. The idea is that you teach kids to do mental math faster by combining numbers to make them easier to add and subtract. My kids seem to do well with this method, but I really hate the format of these books. Singapore math comes with a textbook and a workbook for each kid, along with an instructors’ guide for me. Since all of them are soft cover, I personally don’t see why they need more than one book to begin with, and the instructor’s guide is difficult to follow. With three kids in three different maths, I am constantly flipping pages in these books to look for the answers to the workbook or the textbook or to find the day’s lesson. At this point, I am handling 1st and 3rd grade math confidently. I am okay with 5th grade math, but I have to admit that I have already been stumped on a word problem. (My fifth grader got a huge kick out of seeing me struggle with her math problem for 20 minutes. We giggled all the way through it. It will make a great memory, I’m sure!)
So, there you have it– the good, the bad, and the ugly. Have a great school year everybody!
I had my first negative comment over my blog (which is great, because it must mean that someone other than my mother and aunts are stopping in to read.) This comment, laced with expletives, complained over one statement in my writing which apparently made the commenter very angry. In this statement, I explained my firm belief that young children are not developmentally ready to wear masks all day, and also pointedly said, “I do not have research to back this up, and I don’t care. I am a mom. I have 5 kids. I don’t need a post-doctorate to come to this conclusion.” Yeah– those were fighting words, I suppose.
This person who disagreed with me complained that anti-science people like me are what is wrong in our country. Ouch. Am I anti-science? I had to take some time to reflect on this statement. I have definitely never thought of myself as someone who is anti-science or anti-education or anti-establishment, (although I admit that those sentiments are growing during this season of life.) I actually loved school and did very well academically. I also considered Chemistry as a major in college, but ultimately chose the Humanities, as they were more interesting to me overall (and still are).
I’m also married to a science dude (veterinarian) and have multiple doctors in my extended family. I’m fully vaccinated as are my children. I generally respect doctors. So, am I anti-science or not? And, am I really representative of what is wrong with this country?
To me, science is a discipline that can answer questions about how things work. It is a system of study designed to answer questions about our world. It has done some really amazing things for our world, but the field has also had some really horrible results (think eugenics.) Science is a powerful discipline that has great potential, but in my humble opinion, it should never be divorced from the other disciplines or allowed to rule over them.
In this pandemic, scientists are working hard to protect people from disease. They are using the best research that they have to prevent deaths due to an epidemic. When I get frustrated that Dr. Fauci’s recommendations are really cramping my style, my veterinarian husband reminds me that this is Fauci’s whole job– to prevent infectious diseases.
So, maybe Fauci and co. are doing an awesome job, but as I stated earlier, science is only one discipline out of many that teach us about life. Science can tell us how things work (again, imperfectly), but it can’t answer deeper questions on its own.
Science can’t tell us how much a smile is worth. It can’t tell us the value of a hug. Science can’t tell us what the cost of giving up close relationships is in favor for virtual ones. It can’t measure the worth of a small business to its owner. It can’t tell us what effect our social distancing is having on young people as they develop. It doesn’t tell us the social or political consequences of government “lockdowns” or extended wearing of face masks.
I’m all for science guiding us during this pandemic– but I am not all for it having the only voice in the room. If we make “science” into our dictator, we are going to lose a part of ourselves. I think science can be a guide, but I fear that many in our country have turned it into a god.
If we silence voices that disagree with the way we are doing things because they do not come from the “science” field, we have a problem. If regular people who are being impacted by pandemic mitigation do not have a voice in how we should handle said pandemic, we have a problem. If a person who does not have a post-doc is now bullied because she sees things a different way, then we have a problem.
Some of the smartest people I know have impressive degrees. Some of the smartest people I know also have no degree at all. Not everyone sees the things the way the head of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases does. We obviously need the voices of scientists during this time. But– we also need economists, sociologists, parents, educators, pastors, and regular people to understand how everything is playing out here. If we don’t take all voices into consideration, we are missing out in a big way. Am I anti-science? Nah. Let science answer the questions in can answer, but let’s not make it do things in was never intended to do in the first place. In the end, science is a tool; it should never be our god.
So, I’m stuck back here thinking about masks on students in schools. I’ve already chosen to home school for the year, but still. My philosophy on public schools is that schools and students do the best when parents are involved in the educational process. Withdrawing from the school system may be better for my family (and my mental health!) in the short term, but what is the effect if more and more parents disengage from the system long-term?
We are hearing a lot about “systemic inequality” in our country, particularly in regards to our “black and brown” brothers and sisters. I have no doubt that those inequalities exist for very complicated reasons, but one reason is that as things got worse in the inner cities and more disadvantaged people (often people of color) moved into communities, more and more affluent people (often whites) left those cities. This flight undoubtedly left things in a poorer state than everyone’s continued engagement in their communities might have.
My theory is that public schools are the same type of system. The kids who are served in the public school are often the ones who have the least resources. Their parents can’t send them to private school, and they can’t afford and may not have the skills to homeschool them. As things get worse in a public school district, more and more of those who can will leave, while those who can’t will stay in a crumbling system.
My local school system is not perfect, but it is still good. Parents are still involved in the process, and yet. I fully understand why parents choose not to send their children to school and choose other options (as I am indeed doing this year.) When a parent feels like he or she has no say over the educational process and that his or her child may be harmed by the system, what is a parent’s natural response? Obviously– to pull her children from the school district.
Well– I’ve chosen that direction for this time period, but I am not disengaging from the process completely– not yet. There are two main reasons that I could not stomach sending my children to school this year. In our state, universal “mandates” have come floating down from our governor. All children (two years old and up) are mandated to wear masks all day in school. This is deal breaker #1 for me. Not too many years ago, I was a public school teacher, and it was hard work. It is hard to get kids to bring their pencil to class, let alone to wear masks all day long. Masks on children (especially in the early elementary years) seems like a ridiculous mandate made up by people who are out of touch with the reality of childhood. Children from the ages of 2-7 (at least) are not developmentally ready to wear a mask all day. I do not have research to back this up, and I don’t care. I am a mom. I have 5 kids. I don’t need a post-doctorate to come to this conclusion. I have no desire for my children to go to school to learn how to wear a mask all day long.
Deal breaker #2: in my state, my governor enjoys throwing down mandates at very inconvenient times– such as changing rules a week before school starts. I have very little confidence that the floating mandates will not also affect and interrupt the rest of my kids’ school year, dragging them back into online learning, which, in my opinion, is not a Free Appropriate Public Education for children in rural areas with spotty internet (and for elementary children, in general, as skills like socializing and physical activity will fall to the wayside for obvious reasons.)
So, here I am, wondering how I can still engage in a system that I believe in, while hypocritically doing what is best for my own children (and me.) But– hear me out, parents. These public schools are made to serve our children. Parents– our schools and our communities need our voices in the educational process. If we want our communities to be stronger, we need to stand up and make our voices heard– not just for our children, but for our community’s children.
So far, I have e-mailed my school administrators, the governor (twice,) my state senator, and my state congresswoman. Now, not everyone will share my exact opinions here, and that is okay. That is not really my point. My point is that parents care about their kids more than anyone else. We need to continue to advocate for them, using our political processes and engaging in the system as much as we can. Parents– these are our children, and if anyone is being left behind during this pandemic– it is them. Let’s stand up– work through the process– and advocate for them. Our school districts and communities will be better when we stand up.
In our culture today, there are so many things that you “shouldn’t” say. You shouldn’t say that you believe in standing for the pledge of allegiance because you will be labeled a racist. You shouldn’t say that marriage is meant to be between one man and one woman because then you are intolerant and hate gay people. You shouldn’t say that America has been a good country because then you aren’t noticing all of the sins it has committed. You shouldn’t say that a man is a man even though he thinks he is a woman because then you are transphobic. You shouldn’t say that Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion make “nasty” music because then you aren’t empowering women.
I am not someone to stir the pot. I believe very strongly in respecting all people, no matter what their beliefs are. I strive to love all people, even if I sometimes fail. I think that participating in our culture and interacting with people I don’t agree with is good and what Jesus would do.
But– why am I (and so many others) expected to pretend that we agree with the majority opinion (or at least the loudest opinion?)
I am not a Donald Trump fan. I think his morals are lacking and his approach and demeanor are not helpful or unifying for our country. I wish we had chosen better. But, I understand why people vote for him.
I think people are attracted to him because he says what he thinks. What he really, really thinks. In a nutshell: many people in our country are tired of pretending, and so they are headed on the Trump train.
If you want to blame someone for where we are politically, let’s think about adding nuances to our national conversation. Let’s understand that not everyone sees or accepts the new moral order. Let’s understand that we have true diversity in our country, including diversity in the way that we think. Let’s stop immediately condemning everyone who does not hop on the latest bandwagon.
We need people who think differently than us; we need one another, but we also need to respect that we are not always going to agree with one another, and we need to stop apologizing for not always thinking alike.
Do we want true diversity in our country? That includes diversity in thought. Speak the truth– but don’t forget to do it in love.
My four year old is very conscious of death for a little guy. When he was three years old, he briefly became a vegetarian when he realized where chicken nuggets come from. His vegetarian phase lasted for a good couple of weeks until the temptation to eat those juicy nuggets finally overcame his reservations. His curiosity about death and dying have not gone away, however. The other night, my blond little boy sat on the couch across from me and randomly said, “Mommy– someday I’m going to die. I don’t know what it will feel like, though. I want to know.” (He’s definitely my philosopher.)
I think some people would be worried about a four year old thinking about dying, but I think it’s healthy and normal for people to think about it– not all of the time– but at least a little. Because, the thing is, in the end– everyone dies. The fatality rate for human beings in this fallen world is currently 100%. If we never get COVID, or never get the flu, or never get hit by a car– in the end– we still die.
Unfortunately, COVID is becoming a dividing line for people who see life and death very differently. Some people see COVID as an immediate threat that needs to be mitigated so people can live life longer. They might get angry at people who don’t follow the strategies that are implemented to keep them safe. Some see COVID as just another threat in a host of other threats and think we should keep living life to the full because life is uncertain anyway. They might feel angry that people are taking away their freedoms.
Me? It depends on the day. I have no desire to get sick, and I certainly don’t want to bring illness back to my loved ones. But, how much life am I willing to give up for the threat of COVID-19?
I think that this decision has to be an individual one, depending on one’s circumstances, health, and other factors. It is our responsibility to watch out for others, yes, but we still have to realize that life is very short and very uncertain. The Bible says, “As for the days of our life, they contain seventy years, Or if due to strength, eighty years, Yet their pride is but labor and sorrow; For soon it is gone and we fly away.”
We have to be real about death and dying. It’s going to happen to each one of us eventually. Our ultimate hope should never be in vaccines or medicine or politics or mitigation strategies, although those might be tools that we can use to fight for life. In the end, our hope has to come from somewhere outside of ourselves, or we have no hope at all.
Jesus offers this. He says in John 11:25 “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; 26 and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?”
When my kids start asking me about death and dying, I try not to brush it off. I try my best to be honest with them. Yes, we are going to die someday– hopefully when we are very, very old, and no, we can’t do anything about that. The best I have to offer them is the hope that one man over 2,000 years ago defeated death for the rest of us when he hung on a cross and died and lived again. That message? It’s a hope that’s an anchor for our souls.
These are hard days for planners. You know the type of people I’m talking about– those who bring their agenda books to meetings and neatly pencil in their commitments. Yep– the covid-19 era is tough for these people. So, say a prayer for them now, because as the popular meme states: These people are not okay.
If you know me, I’m a recovering Type A planner. (Still recovering.) I like to have my calendar filled out as neatly as my messy handwriting will allow. I like to know what will happen tomorrow and next week and even a month from now. Personally, I believe that planning things out is an asset. If you know there is going to be a party a week (or a month) from now, you can get the necessary supplies, budget your time, and not be stressed out on the day of the big occasion. To me, planning is responsible and respectful of other people.
And yet. If I have learned anything from being melded into a big family and now having a big family of my own, it’s that planning is good– but being flexible is maybe even better. When lots of people get together, life contains many immediate needs that sometimes trump the best-laid plans. Children get sick, messes happen, and the washing machine stops working. You have got to be flexible in order to survive.
Now Covid-19 has brought a new kind of stretching to, not just my family, but our whole society. Who would have thought that something as reliable as school would suddenly end for three months of time? (I remember the days when a snow-day off from school was a big deal.) Who would have imagined people holed out in their homes, hiding from a virus– for months? Flexibility is definitely an asset today, and planners need to do their best to let some of their plans go.
I was reading my devotions this morning, and I came to a timely piece of wisdom I thought I would share– from James 4:
13 Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” 14 Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. 15 Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”
I am not in control. I can be a good steward and do my best to plan the next step, but in the end, only God knows what is going to happen next. The things I take for granted are not guaranteed. So, I wait, expectantly, for what is next, balancing my desires with the truth that my plans may not come to fruition. But in the end, His will, and I’ve heard His plans are pretty good.
I am struggling with the decision of whether or not to send my children back to the public school in the fall. I am sure I am not the only parent with this dilemma. First– I have to admit that I am privileged to be in the position where I can choose. Since I am a stay at home parent and since my husband has a job, I have the option to home-school my kids. It might be challenging, but I at least have that option. Others don’t have that choice as they need to work to support their families and their kids need an education. They will have to send their kids back to school.
Last year about this time, I wrote a blog post in support of sending kids, Christian kids, in particular, to local public schools. Now, in this post, I was not dogmatic about my position and I was not against other types of schooling; I was just trying to show the reasons for sending kids from Christian families to the public school. The chief reason that we have sent our kids to public school in the past is that we are attempting to engage in our community– to be where the people are– and to influence others, as well as to be influenced by them. Thus far, we have benefited from the public school and I hope we have been a blessing to it.
Now, enter COVID-19 and things look a little different in 2020. Now, the kids are going to be entering a different system than they left in March. They will be “socially distanced” and will be wearing masks periodically throughout the day. (I am a skeptic of how this will work at the elementary level. I just have a vision of first graders primarily using their mask as a tissue.) Students may be doing part of their schooling online (also, not a fan at the elementary level.) Schools may start up, just to shut down. Overall, it seems like a big headache to me.
So, the bigger part of me wants to pull my kids from school for the year. I would avoid the extra stress that comes from all of the changes and provide my kids with some stability for what looks to be a volatile school year. I’m about 90% sure about this decision.
And yet– I still don’t have great peace about it. Part of me wonders if this is bailing on our school family since other children (my kids’ friends,) our teachers, and our administrators have to deal with all of the chaos, along with the fear of getting sick. Am I teaching my kids the wrong lesson by pulling them from the district? Are we supposed to continue to engage in what looks to be a stressful situation? What is the Christian thing to do in the covid 19 era?
And, of course there are other factors to consider with getting the virus itself. We get sick a lot in our family from the “regular” diseases– flu, colds, and stomach bugs are regular parts of our life with five kids, and cold and flu season are not particularly easy. Am I going to be running to the doctor for every cold or flu now? Will I have to quarantine my kids endlessly through the winter months?
These are tough questions, and this is a hard decision. You can pray for us, and know I will be praying for our schools, parents, and students as well. Once we commit, we will make the best of it, and I think that God can use this situation for good, even if it looks different than what we expected it to look like. But, at this point, I still haven’t answered the question!
Now that our governor has re-issued a “mask mandate,” face-masks are a hot topic once again. I am not going to come out with my opinion on masks (sorry–I know you were really looking forward to hearing it.) Instead, I’m going to try to present both sides of the Great Mask Debate in the hopes that people can see underneath the masks we present (deliberate metaphor here.)
I have heard several stories of people going into stores and either being criticized for not wearing a mask or others yelling back at mask-wearers. I think it helps to remember why people are choosing to mask or not to mask. These are sometimes deeply personal reasons.
So– on the one side… the maskers. Maskers, in general, are trying to prevent spreading covid to others and are trying not to get sick themselves. They believe that masking is a commonsense strategy that can slow the spread of coronavirus in the U.S. and in their communities. Maskers are trying to protect people, and the way they see it, there is very little downside to wearing one. Yes, you are uncomfortable for a few minutes (or hours, depending on your situation), but personal comfort is worth sacrificing for the greater good. They will also point out that it is now the law to wear masks in public in many parts of the United States and that others should follow the laws laid out by people in charge, who, for the most part, have some expertise and knowledge about the spread of disease. Sometimes, maskers can feel that non-maskers are irresponsible or don’t care about them or other people. They may view non-maskers as “selfish,” just by looking at them.
Now the other side… non-maskers. Non-maskers do not buy into the theory that masks (homemade ones, in particular) actually stop the spread of disease. Some believe that mask wearing has not been proven to stop the spread of disease at all and causes everything from personal discomfort (hyperventilating, anxiety, etc.) to real disease from breathing in your own air all day (fungal infections, for example.) Others have different objections to masks. Some have not bought in to the idea of halting covid-19 at all. Many have bought into the “slow the spread” idea, but because there is no treatment or vaccine (and may never be one), they reason that it is best to have the virus run its natural course, in order that the pandemic may be over sooner. Still others are afraid of the government taking too much power over its citizens and will point out that mandating masks, in theory, could become much like making Jewish people wear yellow stars in Nazi Germany. Non-maskers sometimes refer to maskers as “fearful” or “sheep.”
I am not defending either side’s stance here. I actually think both groups have valid points. What I wish would happen, however, is that everyone could see the different motivations underneath the masks (or non-masks as the case may be.) Instead of looking at a non-masker as selfish or irresponsible, would it be possible for a masker to see a person who views the pandemic differently than they do? Instead of a non-masker marking a masker as a fearful sheep, would it be possible for a non-masker to slip a mask over their face while in the store with a masker? Could we respect other people’s views and bend our own for the sake of another’s?
We were reading last night from the book of Titus, a tiny little book nestled in the back of the Bible. I was reading it out loud, and my 10 year old said to me, “Mom– that’s just like all of this arguing about masks.” (She may have heard my diatribe about them being worn by children in schools.) Good point, Ruth. I’ll share what we read together from Titus 3:
3 Remind the people to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, 2 to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and always to be gentle toward everyone.
3 At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. 4 But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, 5 he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, 6 whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, 7 so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life. 8 This is a trustworthy saying. And I want you to stress these things, so that those who have trusted in God may be careful to devote themselves to doing what is good. These things are excellent and profitable for everyone.
9 But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless.
People have argued forever about everything– from circumcision, to festivals, to genealogies, to meat-eating, to mask-wearing. I think if you read other parts of the Bible, you will see that sometimes we are encouraged to draw firm lines and stand and fight for principles, but, in lesser matters– in foolish controversies–we are encouraged to consider other people, to be gentle, and to focus, not on winning the argument, but on loving others. I don’t know which side of the Great Mask Debate you are on (and frankly, I don’t care,) but my hope is that we can take God’s mandate even more seriously than our governor’s.
It is nothing short of amazing to see how fast the values of our country have shifted. Even in my lifetime (I’m not that old!) our morals have changed fundamentally. What once was right is now considered wrong. What was wrong is now right. What’s even more amazing is how many people have accepted this change so completely that they don’t even remember (or appreciate) the way our grandparents used to do things.
Now, we are “enlightened.” Now, we “do better.” Now, we are “woke.” Now, the people who don’t buy into the new morality are bigoted, intolerant, and ridiculous if they have not yet reached moral enlightenment. Clearly, we are living under a new moral– ahem– I mean, normal.
The hot button issues are clear in the new morality: Abortion is freedom, sexual liberation is the ideal, and the individual’s feelings are of utmost importance. (At least, these are among the most controversial issues.) The easiest place to see the new morals celebrated is in the media, of course. Watching the evening news helps us to see what is now “normal” (and right) in our culture. Last night, I watched as our local newscaster casually talked about a pride parade held down the road, where drag queens “performed” and others shared their “coming out” testimonies. Can you imagine if this happened in our grandparents’ lifetime? While drag queens might have been performing in bars in cities, they were likely to be arrested for strutting their stuff around downtown Pottsville, PA, let alone celebrated by the evening news.
Now, what I am getting at here is not exactly to criticize all of the “new morality.” What I am getting at is that the change in morality has been extremely swift and total and has with it, a rather frightening element of hypocrisy.
I was a child of the 90’s, and the new morality really started to take off in my childhood. However– I still remember that the things that are celebrated now, were not celebrated in my childhood. In fact, when I was “coming up,” ( I sound like an octogenarian) we were in the “tolerance” phase of accepting the new morality. We were not yet “celebrating” pride month, but rather, we were encouraged to have “tolerance” for the new morals. “Tolerance” was the goal, except that didn’t really end up being the case.
Instead, the goal was to change the value system of America, by degrees. Now, the vast majority (or so it seems) has bought into the new moral system and holds this new system up as “the way.” The major problem with the “New Morality,” in my opinion, is the hypocrisy it is built on. Instead of giving freedom or allowing diversity of thought as the New Morality originally promised, the New Moral code instead assigns simplistic moral codes that all good people should adhere to. They are just different codes than the codes of yesterday. Rather frightening, isn’t it?
I keep thinking about George Orwell’s books Animal Farm and 1984. I’ll give a very brief summary of Animal Farm, for those who are interested. In Animal Farm, the animals start a revolution to overthrow their unfair and lazy human owner. The pigs (the smartest animals in the book) start out nobly, making up their own government where “all animals are equal.” They establish seven commandments that all of the animals are to follow, and call this “animalism.” The animals all buy into this, but the pigs turn out to exhibit special leadership skills, so special, in fact, that they eventually become exactly like the man that they were originally rebelling against. The original rule “All animals are equal” morphs into “All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.”
Change is inevitable. Cultures come and go. So far, America has survived for over 200 years. I hope it survives for another 200, but who knows? In any case, I think it is helpful to go back and remember what our country was built on, so I’ll go ahead and share an excerpt from the Declaration of Independence:
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. That, to secure these rights, governments are instituted among men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed. That, whenever any form of government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the right of the people to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new government, laying its foundation on such principles, and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their safety and happiness.
Prudence, indeed, will dictate that governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and, accordingly, all experience has shown, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed.
We’re coming up on July 4th when we celebrate what was started long ago. In our journey toward the future, let’s not forget the past. God bless America!
So, I lucked out when it came to dads. My dad has always been an important part of my life, since the time when I was little to the present, when I am lucky enough to live next door to both of my parents. I don’t take this for granted.
In my family, “Dad” was always the one you would go to when you wanted something (or wanted to get out of something.) He was the one who was the most likely to say “yes” to whatever my sisters and I wanted. He’s still like this, by the way. Any one of my children can go right up to “Gramps” and ask him for anything (fruit snacks are their favorite,) and he is happy to oblige. He also hates to see any of them cry and will do whatever he can to dry their tears (again– fruit snacks.) But, my dad was more than just the “fun dad.” He taught me how to look at the world from different perspectives, how to have a sense of humor, and how to show empathy and compassion to others. My relationship with my dad set me up to have really good relationships with the men in my life, and for that, I am very thankful.
When I picked out the man who would be the father of my kids, I did not pick out a man exactly like my dad; perhaps this is because I am too much like my dad to marry someone like him. In our relationship with our kids, I am the soft touch, while “Dad” is the one who is more likely to say no or to hold the line firmly. Even though my kids’ dad is different than the dad I grew up with, I know that this relationship is setting my kids up to have great future relationships with their spouse. They are learning that men are reliable and trustworthy and that they can be counted on to be strong and protect them (and throw them up way too high in the air to their infinite delight and to my consternation.)
As I was thinking about fathers’ day and what the day means, I was pondering how grateful I am for these two men, but my thoughts also went to all of the relationships I have had with father figures in my life. Sometimes our culture is hard on men and portrays them as bumbling, macho caricatures. But the men I know who have made a difference in my life would not have fit into any of those stereotypes.
Don Boardman was one of those men. After church services, he would take time to talk to me about the latest book I was reading or just chat about what my interests were at the time. The biggest impression he made on me, though, was when he would read his poetry in front of church and his eyes would well up with tears. Seeing Don up in front of church with his eyes welling up with emotion while reciting poetry gave me a different perspective of what a “man” is, a perspective I hope to keep in mind as I raise my own little boys.
Another man whom I secretly adopted as my grandfather more recently was my Sunday school teacher Ron Herr. Here was another man who “emoted” freely and enjoyed sharing his thoughts with us, along with laughter (and tears.) He taught me that men can have big ideas and dreams and that they can pursue them at any stage of life. He showed me how to invest in relationships with younger people and how to have enthusiasm for those relationships even when there were many years separating us. When he died unexpectedly, I let my tears fall freely.
I really did luck out when it came to the men in my life, because, honestly, there’s a list of good men who have made a big impression on my life, from my dad and husband, to Sunday school teachers, professors, and coaches. To each and every one of those men: You have made my life richer! Happy Fathers’ Day!
I consider myself to be a fairly intelligent person. I am college-educated, well-read, and I know I’m not stupid. But, I’m finding it difficult to understand the news these days. Once upon a time I didn’t feel that reading “the news” required me to fact check sources or to research who owns the company who put the information out in the first place. But, in our current climate, that’s often what I feel I must do in order to have a balanced idea of what is going on in our country and world.
I’ll point out two very obvious players in the news world whose “news” is more than a little confusing: CNN and FOX News. Here you have two sides of the same coin. One is obviously a leftist-leaning propaganda machine, while the other is similarly a right-dominated operation. (I probably don’t need to explain which is which, do I?) You can read about the same issues on each outlet, but each will have an obviously biased spin on that story. Here are two from yesterday’s news, both about police-forces (obviously a hot-button issue right now): See the shocking moment police pushed man to the ground (CNN, June 5, 2020) and Houston cop seen comforting 5-year-old girl at George Floyd protest (FOX NEWS, June 5, 2020). Both stories most likely happened. Both stories are probably technically true, but notice how each station highlights what they want you to think about and see? Neither carried the opposing viewpoint that I could see. (You can play this game every day if you want. It’s super fun!)
Once upon a time, I was an English teacher, so my job was to help kids to read and think critically about what they read. This is so important right now that I thought I would go ahead and give my best English-teacher advice about finding truth in a world of confusion.
Get your information from a variety of sources. This is probably the most important step you can take. Everyone has a bias, and it is easy to read only sources that support your bias. Don’t do that! Read articles and opinions from many perspectives. You will see that the world is bigger than just one story.
Go to the original source if possible. So this week, I started seeing a “retracted” article on most news outlets. Apparently, Surgisphere, a “data-analytics company,” had their study about hydroxychloroquine published in The Lancet, a medical journal. Fact-checkers raised objections to the truthfulness of the data, especially when they were unable to see it for themselves. Here’s a link to one article I read about this situation on Reuters. Checks and balances are good things! (Disclaimer– I am not saying that hydroxychloroquine is effective… I have no idea! And, it seems that the medical community does not yet know at this time, either, despite what CNN blasted all over its front page for days.)
Check for professional, conventional grammar and spelling in full length news articles. If an article is full of misspellings and grammar errors I have a difficult time believing that the people who wrote the article are people I should take seriously. (This rule does not necessarily apply to all cases. There are many people who may not have the best spelling or grammar who still have important things to say– sometimes on social media, for example.) But if it’s a “published” professional article, it had better follow conventional English rules if I am going to take it seriously!
Hold tight to common sense. Common sense is not something that you can think your way into. People can come up with elaborate arguments to support almost any perspective. If it defies common sense that is based on the vast majority’s human experience, then even it if it is wrapped up in fancy arguments, I’ll tend to ignore that particular viewpoint!
Keep searching for the truth. Jesus said in Matthew 7:7, “ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.” Of course, not everyone believes what the Bible has to say, but it is a book that has stood the test of time and that will influence our world for much longer than our current media will. Keep searching, keep asking, and keep believing that there is truth in the world and God will honor your search for it.
Be humble. Sometimes, we get so stuck in our own mindset that we can’t see that we have been missing out on seeing things from a different perspective. Diversity in thought is not bad; we don’t all have to believe the same exact things, but we can benefit from listening to others’ perspectives, too. There is no way I have this current situation all figured out, and there is a probable chance that you don’t either.
I should have made this list an even five or ten like a good teacher, but I’m going to stop there. In conclusion– be a smart reader and think about what you are reading. Get your news from a variety of sources, and don’t forget to search for a Truth that lasts.
There’s a (very shallow) show on TLC I have watched a few times while channel surfing. It’s called “Three Weddings,” and the brides compete to put on the “best” wedding, which they decide based on rankings for things like venue, dress, and food. I don’t really recommend the show unless you want to lose a few brain cells, but it came to my mind this fall as I was running three different races, and I thought I’d like to spend a little time “ranking” these races for anyone who might be interested in deciding which races are the best to run.
So, here’s my “Three Races” recap of three half marathons near Rome, PA.
#1- The Warrior Trail Half Marathon- Shickshinny, PA- August 12, 2023
We picked our races based on proximity to Bradford county PA, and the date, and day of the week, giving preference to Saturday mornings. Our first half marathon of the summer was the Warrior Trail Half Marathon. Located approximately an hour and a half southeast of Rome, PA, Shickshinny was within easy driving distance. The race began at 8 am, and for a mid-summer race, the temperature was not scorching at this time in the morning. One interesting thing about signing up for this race was that it took them forever to open up registration for the race. I kept waiting and waiting for sign-ups because I figured it might be the one and only race I would train for, but I was well into training for the half before registration actually opened up. This race was not the most expensive half that we did this fall at $50, and it had the best perks of all, including a really nice medal and a pretty t-shirt made of comfortable material. As for the race itself, it was shaded and flat (great for summer) and… extremely boring. A friend who ran the race said the most challenging part of it was staying awake. The trail ran along a river path and was a plain out and back course. Simple, but dull. There were 67 runners in this half marathon, and my husband and I finished in 2:01:32 and placed 30th and 31st out of 67 runners. In retrospect, the race was relatively inexpensive, nicely done, but dull. Also- the after race food and drinks were on par. Three stars.
After our first half marathon, I was planning on being done, but Stephen wanted to tackle another to keep up some motivation for running, so we signed up for our next race on October 7, 2023. This race, held in Sayre, PA, was the closest race to home (30 minutes from Rome) and was almost not held at all, due to the low number of participants. This race began at 9 am and was a point to point half marathon starting in Sayre and finishing in Sheshequin. This race was extremely low-key and didn’t seem to advertise itself very well. It was very hard to find information about this race, and we ended up missing the bus to the starting line because we couldn’t figure out what time it left from the finish. The reason for the race was to support the Down Syndrome community, and we got to meet our “buddy” after the race. It was a cool concept and a downright cheap race at $25. We also got a nice long sleeve t-shirt, a water bottle filled with treats, and an awesome lunch afterwards. There were only 20 runners who finished this race, and again, we ended up in the middle of the pack at #10 and #11, clocking in at 1:59:05 and 1:59:10 (to be picky, that wasn’t really the correct time for either of us ,even according to their clock,) but again, this race was so low key, that I don’t think the race workers were extremely concerned with details like times. As for the run itself, this half marathon was my favorite, with nicely rolling hills and lovely views. The weather was also decent at about 50-60 degrees with a nice drizzle. Perfect running weather. My opinion of the Sheshequin Half Path is that it probably isn’t going to continue unless the race directors do a better job at advertising and organizing the race. I hope it continues, and I think it has a lot of potential, but I won’t be surprised if this is one run that doesn’t continue. Three stars.
#3- The Red Baron Half Marathon- Corning, NY- October 29, 2023
The Red Baron Half Marathon was held in Corning, NY on Sunday, October 29th, 2023 at 12 pm. I had rather high hopes for this half marathon as I have run it three times previously and have enjoyed the race each time. In the past, the race began at Corning Community College and hit some back roads and rolling hills, eventually descending three miles into the town of Corning and finishing with a flat three miles. This year, however, was a new course, and I had a sense of trepidation heading into the race. The race again started at Corning Community college and this time, instead of descending into town, looped around and around the campus, so that we completed the same basic loop two times. Filled with turn-arounds and hills, this race was the hardest half marathon I have ever run. To make it even more complicated, the race was simultaneously a 10K and a half-marathon relay, with partners completing half of the race, starting fifteen minutes apart from one another. It was so confusing that the winner of the race, following the lead bike, somehow ended up running a different race than the majority of the runners. Regardless, we finished close to 13.1 miles (my watch said 13.3) in a nasty cold rain that chilled me to the bone. It was also disappointing that there were no porta-potties set up on the route and no mile markers set out at all. They did, at least, regularly offer us gatorade and water along the way and were fair at stopping traffic (I mean, nobody got hit, so…) Honestly, the race itself was extremely disappointing, although I did manage to PR for the season at 1:56:38. I would have liked to see what I could have done on a faster course, however, because this one surely wasn’t it. I finished 20th overall, and Stephen, 25th out of about 50 runners. The food after the race was fine, especially the chocolate chip cookies, but the awards were a joke, with a sad little ceramic coaster being the prize for winning my age group. The finisher’s medal was just as bad, being an exact replica of the coaster, on a string. The sweatshirts were okay, although they did not have the correct size for me, and the logo on the front of it was sadly off-center. The Red Baron was also the most expensive race at nearly $80 per person. Overall, the Red Baron was a disappointment for me, and I have to give it 1 star this year.
So, for the three races, the winner was… a tie between the Sheshequin Half Path and the Warrior Trail Half Marathon, with the Red Baron coming in a distant third! I’m taking a little break from half-marathons for a the winter, but I would like to try another one in the spring, so look for another race review then. Until later, keep on running!
I believe that with six kids, we have officially attained large family status. Because of this newly reached status, I feel very qualified to give some unsolicited advice to anyone approaching a large family. I understand that many people feel awkward when meeting people and want to say something to break the ice, but there are some things you should never say to your neighborhood large family, and so, I have taken the time to compile a list of those sayings and why they are never appropriate. (All of these phrases have been heard in real life, and I assure you, that none of them are appropriate in any situation.)
“Here comes the baby-making factory!” To me, it is fairly obvious why this is a non-starter for a conversation with any woman, but if you are struggling to understand why you should not say this, let me give you advice– you do not compare women to factories of any sort under any circumstance!
“Five minutes of fun for a lifetime of work!” A favorite phrase of dirty old men everywhere, this little gem should not be uttered by anyone, anywhere! Highly inappropriate!
“When is the baby due?” This nugget is sometimes spoken with good intentions, but the best of intentions can get any (man) into trouble. You must never ask a woman this question. It is possible that the baby is still eight months away from being born or that the woman has already given birth. You’ll save yourself a good deal of embarrassment by keeping your mouth shut.
Don’t you know what causes that yet?” An oldie, but a goodie, this phrase is better left unspoken. (Newsflash– everyone I know who has any kids at all– knows what causes this.)
“Are you Catholic or Mormon?” Just– no, dear reader. I could ask you some questions, too, but I’ll refrain.
“Are you done yet?” For some reason, this question is always asked by someone I have just met. I always feel like saying-Oh, yes, let’s discuss this together. What are your thoughts on this, person I have just met? Oh, thank you so much for your insight, random stranger! I dearly hope I have given you the correct answer!
“Awww…. so sweet… you look just like a mother duck with six little ducklings.” Um… no… we don’t compare women to machinery… or to animals either!
“So- how many are there anyway?” A slightly better question than counting them out loud in front of the family, but again, is there a reason you must know the exact number? Sit back, and be amazed– it’s six! Can you count that high?
“My- your hands are full!” Honestly, this one doesn’t bother me much at all, but I know it offends many matriarchs with large families, so it is better left unsaid.
And finally, my personal favorite– “are they all yours?” Probably the most common question I get, this one always tempts me to make a smart remark. I mean- not sure about that one! I mean- I think so? Or maybe– they’re for sure mine, but we’re not for sure they are all his. (Ask a stupid question… you know the rest.) So, the next time, you see a family with four, five, six, or– gasp!– even more children trailing behind, try this phrase instead: What a beautiful family! You sure are blessed! (That wasn’t so hard, was it? Isn’t it great to have good manners?) You’re welcome! .”
"But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
"But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
"But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
"But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
My View from the Eagle's Nest 